Sueanne's Story Unfolds

Here it goes again...

2009-05-14T21:38:00.003+08:00

The story of many dissappointed top scorers appear once again.
http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2009/5/14/nation/3880204&sec=nation

It has become an annual affair.

It makes me wonder what is really "wrong" with the whole system. Obviously reflects that our country is quite far off from 'meritocracy'. Sigh....

No wonder so many people flee the country, and many not to return, after being put off by this sense of injustice. Well, at least, I'm close to being one of them. If God wills, I will return to Malaysia one day.

Forced Leave

2009-04-02T13:37:00.002+08:00

Am on leave for three days! Glad that I've been given a break... after working like mad. Not to mention that my weekends are usually gone before i know it!

Appreciate the time i have to myself, to catch up on things that i need to look at, to take time and reflect.

Yet, am quite unhappy with all the new policies the company is implementing. From the look of it, i may not stay as long as i thought i would. No point slogging so hard for the company who doesn't appreciate its employees' effort... yet for now, i'll stick through till i've decided what i want to do.

Of course, i hope that i will be able to attend SOL... see how :)
when i quit audit. hah.

Audit Peak

2009-02-03T21:33:00.003+08:00

have forgetten what is it like to have a free night on weekdays.
been working like **** the last few weeks. leaving office after midnight since middle of Jan. came back to work on the 3rd day of CNY. worked till 5am for 2 days consecutively. surviving only on 3+ hours of sleep.

now I'm dead tired.

thank God for a good team to work with, friends at work.
thank God for His grace. thank God for love, which helps me cope with my inner struggles.
thank God for just being here with me although I admit I didn't have a good start this year.

Being twins

2009-01-03T12:39:00.002+08:00

Funny... only twins reading this will know how it feels.

My senior (quite crappy) said, "Eh, I tell you a secret, but don't tell anyone".

My intern and I looked at him.

"I'm a twin".

Then the intern said, "I'm a twin too!".

and of course I said, "We've got to be joking cos I'm a twin too!".

*faints*

how rare is it that in a group of 3 people, all of us are part of a twin.
haha, totally made my last day of 2008 memorable!

December

2008-12-13T23:17:00.003+08:00

December is a month of weddings! had attended 2, turned down 1. 1 or 2 more to go. Congrats to Maureen and Elsa!

Have been thinking how fragile life is. Went to Sitiawan for a friend's wedding and the morning after the wedding, she got news that one of the wedding guest lost his life in a bus accident along the way back to Singapore. (the accident killed 10 passengers).

I was shocked. He was only 26. I wondered he could still be alive if he had gone back with the rest of the guest from Singapore. I know God has His prefect timing and is in control of all things. yet...

Then came the thought of losing my family. I blurted out a couple of weeks back that I'ld rather pass on than to live in grief. Well.... i think, i think too much.

soul searching... thinking if its all worth it.

2008-11-22T22:11:00.002+08:00

it's exciting.... yet, my heart aches whenever i think about it.

why...

my trust, faith and patience is trully being tested... one part of me tell me that it will be all worth it. but the other part of me is really losing hope.

Men are curious...

2008-11-02T21:22:00.003+08:00

Within 2 weeks I drove pass Geylang twice!

Why? Cause the males were curious to see what the "hype" was all about. The first male was a friend.... and the other is ahem none other than my dad!

When my guy friend proposed the idea, i was totally against it. But I myself was curious... i mean after 3 + years of being here, I have yet to see for myself what it looked like (although I have seen even more eye popping ones in Holland).... so I obliged... after taking into consideration that it wasn't just me and him in the car, of course!

So we drove by the area around 11pm. It was quite interesting to watch the people touting by the roadside. I must say that the ones in Holland were classier (if there is such word). My heart was really sadden at such a sight, really.

Told my dearie bout it n said that my parents will know nothing about it :)

But but... today, my dad came down to singapore. and after dinner, he suggested to my uncle about taking a look in geylang. Men!

anyway, we drove pass the area (this time, i took another lane)... and saw many people of a different race. how organised.... different lanes for different race.

So now that it is no secret from my parents... shhh... dun tell my leader (>.<)

thank you

2008-10-30T22:59:00.002+08:00

thank you to those who remembered my birthday. appreciate it.

had the chance to celebrate my 24th b'day with my dearest :) after 3 bdays alone, we finally celebrated it together....

Nasty

2008-09-22T21:17:00.005+08:00

Fell while playing captain's ball 2 saturdays ago... my left knee scrapped the sand.

after 1 week it dried up and healed.

Then I thought yay! can go jogging again.

So off I went today.

Lo and behold, in my final round, I suddenly tripped and went crashing down. This time my right knee got cut so bad that I was bleeding non stop. Blood just flowed all the way to my ankle till my shin was soaked. My skin peeled off that my fat underneath could be seen!

sigh...what a bloody mess :(

Phuket Trip 24 - 31 Aug 08

2008-09-02T21:18:00.002+08:00

Just came back from Phuket. Was an interesting trip and it ended in a way that we totally didn't expect. Our flight was cancelled due to the demonstrations in Thailand. And instead of waiting any further, we decided to drive down all the way from Phuket to Melaka. Total journey took 18 hours! Not to mention we were travelling very, very fast.

The island is changing rapidly from the last visit I had in 2006. Property prices are soaring as foreigners are flocking here to buy a second home. Cost of living has also escalated. The beaches have been reconstructed and tourists are coming back after the tsunami disaster (although it will surely be affected by the unstable political situation right now).

Also discovered that there are new churches in the island.... that's great news. However, there is still much work as 95% of the Thai population remains Buddhist. People there need sheperds, leaders and elders.

During our 1 week there, we met up with many of the brothers and sisters, whom my parents met when they were here a some years back... 2004/05 I think. They still come here to follow up with the people. And I see that they really look up to elder people in the faith. Well, see how God speaks to my parents....

For some pictures, click here.

2008-08-18T11:15:00.002+08:00

I noticed that I haven't been updating this place regularly...

Let's see what have I been up to since the OA trip.

K, I attended my first company off peak party at Zouk. There were 8 of us girls together. Apparently for 4 out of 8, it was our first time going clubbing. Well, its free and cos we were celebrating our friend's bday. My conclusion - will never go clubbing again. Such a waste of time and money.

Totally skipped cell for te whole July! Got to admit that I was going through some issues then. Actually the cell is still... But curiously, its growing. We never had new believers joining (those newbies came from another church/cell). But of the past month, we had 2 new believers! Praise God.
So, as for cell, I believe God has placed me for not by accident. Instead of murmuring, I shall just give the best of what I have and the circumstances.

Also, helped out in RBC's conference last month. I was heart warming to meet the writers of Our Daily Bread. I was encouraged to hear how this devotional is touching and changing lives of so many people all over the world, especially in Africa.

Have also been looking into other areas to serve. Been serving in worship min for 8 months now. But having just came back from the OA, I still feel the inclination to missions. I guess there is where my heart is. So while I was praying about it, Carly came up to me during FOC and asked me if I wanted to help out in Gcube! Update later...

Passed the mark of my 1st year in the working world. Its good to see the pay rise and bonus! Well, just see how long I can last here. I mean I like the nature of my job and all... and at the same time, I don't see myself doing other things. So, just stay haha. Just hope that nobody pisses me off or rub me in the wrong way or take me for granted...grrr...

So, continuing... I do hope that someday, I can use my professional skills and work in a non profit organization. Yup, that's it. That's what I want to do (that's my desire from the bottom of my heart).

Oh, and this week is a real testing time. Where I face my fears. Let's just say I'm still scared of darkness and sleeping alone. Hope my breakthrough comes!

Orang Asli Trip 21 - 22 June 08

2008-07-01T23:35:00.004+08:00

Joined a mission trip to the Senoi tribe in Kg Woh, Tapah, Perak. It was a medical mission, to bring medical stuff, food and to build bridges with the people there. The team comprised mainly of medical doctors and soon-to-be doctors... and i just "kaypoh"... it was my first trip to the OA.

Above is the only water tap in the village. People bathe and do the dishes there. In the back ground is one the the houses they live in. Their houses were built on the mountain slope. When we first arrived, we were quite afraid of how are we going to climb the slope with a bag of 10kg rice? haha, the kids looked like mountain deers running up and down the slope... but we eventually made it :)

Inside, is one huge hall. They do everything in one sinlge space. Cook, eat, sleep... lepak whatever. The house we put the night in was the Tuk Penghulu's. And it was bigger, which a smaller room for their clothings.

Above is the fire over which they were preparing dinner. The villages eat only once a day. And usually if any visitors come by, they will gather together and cook a feast - we had bamboo shoot, petai and sardines... excellent! not to mentioned eating with our fingers, on the mat.

Before dinner, the team decided to take our bath in the river. It was crystal clear and the water was sooooooo refreshing!

After dinner, we presented 2 mimes and had a sing-a-long sessiong with the villagers.
Sleeping in the hut was a hot, hot experience, but when the morning comes, it becomes so cold! Thankfully, the night passed without any "events".

The next morning, we conducted out sunday service. Worshipped together and the kids when for the children ministry. The adults remained in the hut and Sally (our TL) shared some basics about Christianity and about struggles in life. After that, she openned the altar for people to be prayed for.... k, i got to admit i had difficulty praying in Malay :S

After the service, the medical team kicked into action. They conducted a talk on community health and had a clinic. Above is a picture of my sister in action.
After reflecting on this trip, I guess there are a few things that really matters. We lived in luxury and these kids here have so little. Most of them drink coffee, instead of milk. How can they ever get enough nutrients? Where I am now, people feast like crazy...

I must say that this trip is definitely different from the two previous trips I've been. And this definitely speaks more as this is my home country...

FOr the album, me and my sis on the first mission trip.

Bintan Trip 11 - 14 June 08

2008-06-24T23:36:00.002+08:00

A bunch of girls was sitting on the beach in sentosa one lazy evening. Then someone suggested that they should go for a short getaway. After all the talking and planning, it finally came true. 8 girls on a 4 day 3 night trip to Bintan Island, Kepulauan Riau, Indonesia.

The girls miraculously secured their leaves and met on 11 June 08 at Bedok. They bought their groceries (to cook during their stay there.. yumm..). On their menu was water cress soup, sphagethi, mashed potatoes, chicken casserole and a mushroom dish!
From Bedok they headed down to Tanah Merah Ferry Terminal. Bought their ferry tickets (waited 3 hours) and left for Bintan at 5pm on Indera Bupala. Arrived at Bintan Nirwana and after much hassle with the management, they checked into Suria 2... the villa where they spent their next 3 nights.

The girls spent their time "nuah-ing" away. Each morning would begin with a hearty buffet breakfast.

On the first day in Bintan, they walked along the beautiful beach - white sand, crystal clear waters with clear blue skies. Then lazed under the coconut trees and dipped in the pool, under the mid-afternoon sun... and the writer had severe sunblock for the negligence of not putting sunblock on her shoulders! (her skin is still peeling at the time of this journal entry).

The night was spent cooking dinner, playing games and chit-chatting.

The next day, the girls decided to explore Bintan. They ventured beyond the Nirwana gardens compound and arrived at Pasar Ole-0le.... only to find out that the place was a market built for tourist! Shock and dissappointment came over the writter... although she already expected it to be what se saw. A local approached them and offered to drive them to the local town to explore. The writer, being the type that loves to explore new things, agreed... thankfully, the rest agreed too.

So off they went, on a 1.5hour car ride to Tanjung Pinang, the main town in Bintan. They found out that it was a small town and was not very developed. There was a port, government offices, shophouses and residential houses. There was nothing much to see there. They returned to their villa in the late evening. Rested, prepared dinner and chilled out.

The last day, the girls woke up, packed and left Bintan on the 11.30am ferry back to Singapore.

It was a good trip, with lots of rest and getting to know each other. Thank God for friends made.

Forgive me

2008-06-15T16:33:00.002+08:00

I repent.

I will not do it again. I have satisfied my curiousity and I won't try it again.

I'm trully sorry... I have not set that standard of holiness among my friends.

Forgive me and help me change and be the example that you want me to be.

Refresh me

2008-06-01T23:02:00.002+08:00

Just came back after a super long day today. left my room at 6.15am and came back at at 10pm.

My mind is just dead now... can't think.

And all I want is to just wait upon You. To enjoy your sweet presence. And to just fellowship with You.

You are all I want. You are all I desire. Nothing else matters, God. Help me in the coming week. I ask for grace and favour.

9 days home - Family Trip

2008-05-27T22:48:00.004+08:00

Took a week off work and headed home just to spend some time with my family, since my bro is back and my sis can take off from school... its a rare opportunity for all of us siblings to be back at the same time. my parents must have been quite stressed with all the noise around hahaha! the house is so peaceful when my sis and i are away.
Anyway, after much persuasion, i manage to get everyone to agree that we go Genting Highlands for a 3 day trip. Reasons -
1. I wanted to feel the adrenaline rush of roller coasters and free fall before my age catches up on me and before I feel intimidated by them!
2. The last time I was there, I was only 18. Underaged to enter casino. Now I am an adult :p
3. Weather is super hot. So nice to enjoy the temperature of 20deg Cel... and of course the cold weather reminds me of the kind of cool spring I had in Japan a year ago
4. Can't see the next time (in near future) where all five of us will be able to go for a holiday
Yup, so of we went. My first time driving a car other than the kelisa (which my sis calls as Bumble Bee... after Transformers) in KL. It was quite an experince to drive in KL!

The famous Genting sign... 6000ft above sea... which can also be seen from the aeroplane and from afar

Back to our childhood days. (indoor theme park)
First time trying my hands on go-cart
And the 100m free fall on space shot and roller coaster! and another - pirate ship, which i vote the 3 best rides there... The cool weather... and when the clouds come over Genting... visiblity drops to 10m only

Overall, it was quite worth the RM38. We were there from 10am to 7pm (the full opening time haha), and managed to cover all the rides, including some family rides.

The overall view of Genting and the beautiful sceneray from the top... the wonder of God's creation

2008-05-10T16:35:00.002+08:00

Been reading a book written by a doctor who served among the leprosy patients in India for 19 years. It is interesting how He likens the physical body to the spiritual body, the Church in so many ways. And it is really giving me a fresh understanding of the Church as a body.

Like to share an extract of the book -

Consider the world as if it were shrunk down to a village of 100 persons:

In our town of 100 -
There would be 60 Asians, 12 Eueopeans, 13 Africans and 14 from the entire Western Hemisphere

25 live in standard housing, 20 suffer from malnutrition, 26 of adults are unable to read

20 people possess 90% of the town's wealth. Of the rest, almost half get by on less that $2 a day

2 have college education and 4 own a computer

Qouted from In The Likeness of God, by Philip Yancey & Dr Paul Brand

Make your own conclusion... but personally, I feel a burden God has given me, has something to do with the quote above.
And it really saddens me to see unequal distribution of wealth. Just look at Myanmar now.
Many people in other places of the world need help. And I pray that the we, Christians, would learn how to release the resources & talents God has given us to help them... and not be like tumour fat cells who would just store the nutrients but to learn to release when the time comes.

Christ likeness in my workplace

2008-04-28T22:08:00.003+08:00

I thank God that He is doing something in my life once again. I felt as though I hit a barier just earlier this month.... or say a plateau in my spiritual life. I was just going through life as it is, not thinking much about it... not realising that I was going down hill until I realised that I have hit the bottom.

Well, I thank God that there is somehow a breakthrough... and I feel that that heaviness has been lifted off and His life is just flowing once again. Well, its hard to describe.... but I guess that is you will know it when you have it. I am just so thankful for His presence in my life.

Well, one difference that I noticed is how I am reacting to office gossips etc. I mean when I first started work I was totally disgusted at hearing all the gossips or bad things that people say about others. Then, a few months down the road, when stress piles in and when I work with different (and some very demanding) people, I started joining all these talks... just to let my frustration out. Like rubbing salt or fanning the flame... you get what I mean.

And just today a senior starting saying some "bad" things and even in her jokes - she started to degrade one manager... although I admit that I have heard a fair share of what almost everyone thinks about him.... I felt in my heart an anger that rised within me. Its not the anger that you get when you are mad... but yeah, a feeling just rised within me that I just didn't want to hear anymore of it. And I just turned away.

And I am really working on my complainings... yeah, I do gripe about some people to my friends... but i think God has rebuked me for that and I am working on not complaining. Am constantly reminding myself to be like-Christ in my workplace and to remember that I bear the testimony of Christ in my conduct.

Am praying that God will bring me to another level of walk with Him. Being transformed slowly to be more like Him :)

Idol GIves Back

2008-04-28T22:02:00.002+08:00

Cn you imagine Christian song on TV?

Its amazing how good things can come out of the media. Praise God! My His name be lifted high!

Thankful

2008-04-12T12:16:00.002+08:00

thank God for friends at work :)

work is taking its toll... think that sometimes work consumes so much time that i don't have time to be quiet and just reflect on His goodness. i wake up, read my Bible, and get ready for work... then its work till at night, when i would come back, bathe, tidy some stuff and sleep. last month was so busy that i don't even have time for myself - to read, brush up on my chinese...

i guess this month i will cut down on some things (and perhaps impose a limit on the time spent online).

i confess that i have somehow gotten far from You. help me find my way back to that secret place.

peak taking its toll

2008-03-26T22:16:00.002+08:00

i noticed that i have not updated my blog for some time now. my life is like a roller coaster.

work wise - some weeks are good, some weeks are like shit. thankfully audit is not quite a routine. so, i am not getting bored. new people, new engagements, new offices to visit. but then again, i have been booked on this huge job which is starting on the first week of our "off-peak". i deferred my leave by 2 weeks so that it won't clash with the job, out of courtesy. but the senior now is asking me if she could extend my booking for another month!!!! s***.

social life - i am thanking God for the friends that He gave me. there is a group of colleagues that i have bonded with since we joined the company... and last sunday was the first outing we had outside work... and we are planning for our bintan getaway in June hehe... kinda looking forward to it.

am using my weekends to the max that i sometimes sleep less during weekends hahaha

family - i miss my family. its been 4 months? since i last saw my bro.

and i wil be alone for a week as my roomie went home. hate to admit this (and i honestly think it is silly).. that i am having a slight problem falling asleep. (i hope my roomie doesn't read this hahaha... i'll be so embarassed). i have been sharing room with someone all my life - be it my sis, parents (when i go home and my sis is not back, i sleep in my parents room! haha faints) or roomates. i always have problem falling asleep when i am alone in the room.... that sometimes i resort to leaving the lights on. duh! well, everyone has a weakness right?

so, considering this little problem that i have, i think i can forgo the plan of renting a room to myself. but on a long term plan, i need someone. God, only u know who.

busy weekend

2008-03-04T23:30:00.004+08:00

my saturdays are always packed till i don't have any breathing space
or so free that i have nothing to do at all (usually this happens when i am too lazy to plan anything).

been thinking, singapore is such a small place that there is nothing much to do on weekends (other than shopping, or anything that causes a huge hole in the pocket). you see, ever since i start working, there is no need to study and catch up with work over the weekends (and of course, if you choose not to work haha)... and if I don't go to shopping malls where else is there to go... everywhere is crowded.

so far, the best is to just hang in the nature parks. i love it.

anyway, just to recap last sat

6.30am woke up

7.30 leave to bukit timah reserve

8.30 realised it was raining there. plans cancelled. decided to go vivo - walk around, lunch

1.3opm left vivo for zone meeting in church

5pm zone meeting ended, join cell for dessert, walked to east coast park

6.30 cycling, dinner

10pm home

it was one of the best saturday i had... as it was spent with my dear one :)

east cost park...

last last sat

5.30am woke up

7.15 reach airport to bid farewell to paul

8.45 cross-country from changi to ntu to join CF funday

1.30pm met with Lan

3.15pm rush home to bathe and leave for church

4.45pm arrived at wedding almost an hour late!

7.30pm home

k la. i am just feeling a little down... i don't know why (work stress? tired? lonely?)... and am just typing away to get my mind into something other than feeling down.

Petronas Ads

2008-02-21T23:35:00.003+08:00

I have to admit that the ad is really meaningful.
Speaks volumn about the values that are slowly eroding from our generation.

Missing my family

2008-02-21T22:55:00.004+08:00

missing my family.... well, what is the point of earning so much money but being away from the people closest to my heart?

my grandmas... appreciating every moment I spend with them... although my ah po's memory is fading away, I still love her. my darling parents....celebrating my dad's b'day in an Italian restaurant. Clowning with my dad during our cousin's wedding....haha... look at his face! He must be imagining the day we walk down that aisle or wat?
my dear twinnie.... also featured here is my hunky and tall cousin haha... we never took a picture together in this manner ever since we became "young adults" ahem.
and not forgeting my dear bro.. who is not with us to celebrate this CNY. My prayers always for you. Even tho you may be far away... we are still knitted in our love for one another. (pic taken last CNY)with my fav (and only) ah kor

my rambling

2008-02-15T00:32:00.004+08:00

My parents are pressuring me. People are asking.

And I wonder why is it so hard to find one. Not say I don't want one, but its just that no one ever approached me. I just wonder why.... why some people go in and out of relationships like it is so easy.... why some people find theirs so early... and why some people find it hard to believe that I have never been in a relationship before.... like duh!

Sigh... waiting patiently. It aches sometime I have to admit. Not say that I never had anyone in mind before. Its just that I did not do anything about it. i guess its because I don't know what I should be about it. I really DON'T.. and it just slip pass.

May be I am not ready...sheesshh... what the heck.

Love

2008-01-30T23:21:00.000+08:00

Sometimes we never realise how our thinking and mindset can go really way off until something hits us.

Just last Sunday, God totally shook me. He broke all the "religious" mindset that I have. Well, I guess I didn't even realise that it has gone quite 'off'... that even little common sense should have made sense... but I just wondered why I didn't think of it. Well, I guess that's what we call being "blinded".

But well, light has dawn on me... now I see :)

Anyway, here are some things I would like to pen down to tell myself (in future) -

1. Love practically, with actions... not just words or with prayers. But do something! Like instead of praying, why not look at it as I being the answer to the prayers. Eg, if someone if in need, instead of just saying "let me pray for you", why try to meet that need.

2. Love, not when it is convenient for me only... but to love takes the trouble to go the extra mile.

3. If people don't see love in me, then there is something wrong with me. Cos God Himself is love. If I call myself a Christian and yet people don't see love through me, how can they see God in me?

... I guess its still not too late to make a new year's resolution...
to love

My Trip Pics

2008-01-14T23:08:00.000+08:00

Day 1 - Departure from Changi at 7.20am! 4 hour flight to our destination. On arrival, we were greeted by the whole bunch of Americans working the ground there. Lunch (almost 30 of us!). Briefing. Then we were seperated to our pairs and hosts. I was with Ruth, staying with L and R in the north part of the city. Bought some ingredients to bake cookies for the following night.

Day 2 - BS with a local. Lunch and P-walk.

The university entrance where we where. The family there is experiencing growth like never before! Our host left us there to make new friends. It was scary but thank God through His leading He lead us to a bunch of students. We made contact and even exchange numbers! Thankfully, we had the chance to meet them up again... and made some 'deep' conversations.

Our second night - We had a Christmas cookie decoration night where we invited girls over to decorate home made cookies. Many pre-believers came over. We had such a great time fellowshipping with them. About 4 or 5 heard the Christmas story for the first time. And the few of us had the opportunity to talk individually to the girls and shared our personal testimony. It was amazing!

On a side note: One of them has joined the family recently!

Day 3 - Weekly team time to interceed. Rest. Meet another local for dinner. At night, we had a girls book club. It was basic living as many of them are new in the family and some who have yet to join. During that time, we also had the chance to share how with our local friends how we God had made a difference in our life (i'll have to remember to blog this in my next entry). It was really a good time as we shared with them. And really reminded me to go back to basics about living as a new creation.

Day 4 - Team meeting. The Singapore team gathered to share our experience with each other and it was just a fantastic time! God is really working among the students. How often we hear of so many open doors and opportunities! Challenged to bring this back to Singapore, to where we live.

One of the tourist spot we visited in the afternoon. Its something like Jonker Walk, Melaka. Tried smelly tofu (not smelly tho, to me la). Met another 2 locals for dinner. We spent a few hours sharing and encouraging them.

That night, we had English corner. Its a place where people will gather to speak English. Made some more friends. It funny how there are so many types of people we meet. From the 3 hours there, I realised that their worldview, or specifically the student's worldview.. was that of any modern country. Materialistic. Trying to be better. Wanting to achieve so many things. Yet, I could see they are so lost, without hope or even reason to live... (to con't in next entry). At the end of the few hours standing in the open air with freezing temperature, we exchanged contacts. And suddenly one guy said he was interested! wow, opened door! just like that.

Day 5 - P walk, decorate house Ch - . Bump into one of our friends. Spend lunch time with them. Met her again for BS and shared with her.
That night, our host had this crazy idea. Invited a whole lot of local friend over to sing carols. Not just where we live, but to sing to the entire block! Close to 30 people came. We went door to door, sang some carols to complete strangers. They graciously listen to us and hopefully seed is sown thourgh the songs and little 'papers' given out.

This is how an apartment block looks like.

Day 6 - We met another friend and tried hot pot (hot pot meals usually last a few hours)! Lunch was amazing. We again shared our testi. Its like every meal we try to have it with some friends. And over the meal, we build that relationship and share something into their lives. It just opportunities everywhere! And since I have been back here, am really asking that I will have such chances here. (tho have to admit that the ground here is different. like Heidi Baker said yesterday... that the people here are lost, hungry, poor... but they don't know that they are).

Night, attended service. It was great to finally meet the family there! There was just so many people. And many pre-b. There was a special visitor from America, who is a teacher of the word. The locals realised that he was knowledgable in the word and was able to bring it so clearly. Immediately, they got hold of him and started asking him so many questions!

That night, I saw the hunger they had. The need for teachers to give the locals solid teaching is great. Yes, the need to reach out to the lost is great too. And when they come into the family, they need to be nurtured. But there is just not enough teachers! I really saw that labourers are needed urgently... more so, when we expect His kingdom to advance there. It really broke my heart to see such a urgency and need, not just in this country and in many unreached people groups.

Day 7 - The locals immediately arrange for a special BS while that American teacher is still in town. SO there it was, a few hours later, we were gathered at the same place, learning the doctrine of the faith from Romans 1-4. I was good to see that they wer getting solid food. The second half, was on the Holy Spirit. They have not experience Acts 2. And we studied through the book of Acts to see instances where people received the baptism of the HS. After that we prayed for them to receive likewise.

Night, another service. Many heard the good news.

Day 8 - Observed Sabbath with the whole bunch of workers. Services in the morning. We gathered at one of their house and the pioneer of this ministry happened to be in town. He shared something that really shook all of us. Not an easy topic... Laying down everything we have for His sake. Spend time rededicating ourselves. It was really a powerful time that we ended at 2plus pm!

Evening, our friends brought us to a tourist place. There's a square with musical fountain at 7pm everyday. Hotpot again. And a superb conversation over the long dinner. We could see that God is slowly but surely moving their hearts. From total disbelieff about the existance of God, they are now asking us our testimonies! We shared so many with them!

Day 9 - Gave BS in the morning. Rest and reflection. Spend the night with our host and shared our journey. "spiritual conversations" as one of them puts it!

Day 10 - Bid farewell to our host. Met up with the rest of the team and completed our trip by visiting the Panda Research Centre!

May our lives be truly changed by this trip. Never same old, same old. But let the fire burn!

My december

2008-01-09T22:10:00.000+08:00

I noticed that I have not updated my blog for a month!

Some updates about me:

1) I just moved to a new place at Everton Park (Outram Park mrt). After a long, super long story... and facing much frustration, feeling of being cheated, robbed (...whatever you call it), we didn't move to the place we had planned to move. Talked about being deserted by people, being let down by friends... having to part with the 1 month deposit... and it all happened while I was away in China... not to mentioned that it was not my fault, yet I have to bear the cost.

I prayed so much for grace to forgive and to not let my heart be troubled my the "loss" of money.. though it more than half my salary hurhur...

2) That aside, I had an awesome time in China. Spent 10 days in C-city with missionaries from America (under an organisation that hopes to reach out to tertiary students in the country). It was freezing, the air was poluted (that the municiple has to spray the trees with water to wash them), and the food was amazingly spicy! We made friends, hosted parties, taught the word, encouraged the family there and ... personally had a good time away from my routine life... just to be totally focused on the kingdom work there. I find that its really nice and yeah, I wouldn't mind trading what I have now for that.

Having the chance to stay with the missionaries (and not being treated as though we are on a 'holiday cum mission' trip) really exposed me to what their lifestyle is. Saw the intimacy of their walk with the Lord (which really is their power source), the frustration behind the scenes when things just didn't turn out the way they plan, how tiring it can be when we serve him "full time" (I mean there was no time to say - God, I don't feel like doing it today) and how focused they are on the field.

I learnt that one thing about being effective for Him. The answer is CONSCIOUS EFFORT. When I was there, my mind was set on fulfilling the great commission... because I know that I am on a trip. Hence, I set my mind to be focused, to make effort to reach out.

But back to "reality", where we are everyday, its so easy to be sucked into what everyone else is doing... to be sucked into the small daily affairs of life... to be sucked into routine. Not that they are not important, but they make us lose focus on the more important things that God has in mind. And hence, slowly, little by litte, we find ourselves drifting away from Him...away from His purposes... and then our mindset starts to revolve around us, our career, our need, our wants... and the list goes on.

And then we ask ourselves, what have accomplished at the end of the day? Are any of these of eternal value? Are they something we can be proud of to tell God when we face Him in the day of judgement? Are they worth the price that Christ paid?

Yeah, k, that's my reflection. Better stop before I end up preaching! hahaha.... but yeah, am pondering on that.

Will post some pictures of the trip soon!

Finally, the time has come

2007-12-09T23:03:00.000+08:00

Will be leaving to China 10 - 20 december. Do uphold all of us in prayer, as you know how the situation is in China. Pray for protection and wisdom. Also pray that this short stint there will be able to sow seeds and have impact in time to come.

Am excited.

Thank God that He healed me of my stomach ache. Had BBQ on friday night at Changi Aloha.... then played uno till 3.30am! not to mentioned that I bathe at 2am in cold water! think all these accumulated and.. yeah, i suffered the consequences the following morning. Sian, had to cancell my meeting with a friend, choir practice :s

And its also a coinsidence that I'll be moving out soon. remembered that when i left to Japan, I was also busy packing to move out of hall... and i was sick the day before i left to Japan. And now, history is repeating itself... Am busy packing to move out of my current place and i just fell sick. Hmm.. weird.

Anyway, regarding my new place, thank God we found people to share the place. Its amazing how God provides. I remembered that when I left for Japan, I was fretting over finding a place to rent. And now, this time, I will not fret (although I did initially). I shall just surrender it to Him and trust Him. All the memories of God's faithfullness and provision is coming back to me again. He is just so good!

Feel the heat coming...

2007-11-26T23:01:00.000+08:00

the last two weeks were eventful.. hmm dunno if its the right word. anyway, i was auditing this cement company, in some ulu place... we went down on monday and tho we were booked to be on this job till the following friday, our acting AIC (accountant in charge... in other words boss) said our manager wanted to review our work by thursday... means by wednesday, we must show some more or less completed work. wat to do? work like mad!

we finish by thurs...and we just slacking after that. went to jurong port to do fixed assets sighting. it was interesting to enter the port. didn't know security was quite tight and that we had to pay $2! hahaha, anyway it was an eye opening experience to see the port. visited the cement plant and went into the silo to see how cement is made, packed and loaded into bags/cement truck. priceless experience, but its was very dusty... in fact, very expensive dust... was it was dry cement. yucks

and since i had completed my job one week ahead, my AIC told me to go back office. so, last week saw me moving from a tunneling company (tuesday) to taxi company (wednesday) to a furniture company (thursday). felt like i was thrown here and there. moving like a nomad. and each place i went.. i had to finiish the task in that given day... sighz... so i think i've accumulated quite a lot of OT.

Friday, i began a new job in this japanese trading company. simple and clean job. everything is so in order that my boss said that i could finish in 2-3 days1 eventhough he booked me for a week. anyway, i finish the audit today. in a record time of 2 days without OT man! muahahaa

and thus, the reality of audit life is hitting on me. not many people are left in office. just last month, there were quite a number of people slacking in office that they force us to go on leave. and now, everybody is out at the client's place. no more time to slack... sianz. even worse, last saturday was the first time i kena called to work... at first, i couldn't believe my eyes when i saw the email asking if i'm free for sat and sun... i replied no. thought won't kena, but friday evening i received a call asking me to go, but this time its only saturday. ok lor, i agreed since there wasn't enough people. eventhough i really could use the day to sleep.. i thought it would be better to just offer myself.... in the end, i enjoyed the stock take. almost 6 hours in the warehouse, counting boxes. quite cool to see how the workers manouver the machines and stuff like that.

eventhough its not easy being an auditor, i think i've been "enjoying" my work. the chance of meeting new people, working in teams and moving around from one company to another.... makes it all interesting. especially for someone like me who doesn't mind changes like these :)

just pray that i'll survive the peak... and not just barely making it through but emerging victorious and keeping my heart, life and focus on the One above.

Help!

2007-11-18T17:27:00.000+08:00

started saturday by going to see a unit for rent in redhill. then rushed to church for Edmund Samuel Chu's wedding. Then choir practice. by the time i came back, it was 11 plus.
Sunday was church, cell leader's motherinlaw baptism and dinner with a friend.

Seems ok on the surface, but its like i've been through the hurricane. Didn't know the house viewing would get so complicated. I made in total like almost 1 over hour of calls. Just this weekend alone.

And now my roomate has left for china (won't be back until 2 weeks time), our huge deposit stuck with the landlord (or agent) who won't refund it. I'm left to handle all these matters now. SIGH....

I'm in deep shit. To cut the entire long complicated story, my solution now is to find people (1 or 2) to share the unit with. My roomate and i agreed to take up this particular unit having a few people in mind to share with. but now, each one seems to have an obstacle.

So if you know anyone, that'll be helpful.

details are: place is near redhill, 3 bedroom, $2.5k per month, fully furnished and renovated, and is very pleasant and comfy. i need a person or two who is willing to take the master bedroom. it has an attached bathroom.

Cemented

2007-11-15T23:06:00.000+08:00

the last 3 saturdays was spent in m'sia. hahaha... after 5 weeks of not going back. miss home. heee... at least i went home to celebrate my b'day, for the first time in 3 years.... tho we never do anything special... was just great being home.

and now my overtime leave is depleting. my hard earned overtime seems to burn up so fast...took leave so that i can be home longer. i think in all i took 4 days of TOIL.

just as i was calculating how many TOIL i have left, this week was damn shiong. we went down to the client's place on monday and was told that we must complete it by thursday. but by wednesday, we must have at least some substance to show. faintz! to audit a whole P&L of a manufacturing company with a revenue of close to $30m; and PPE of $40m in cost.... in 2.5 days by myself?

OT like nobody's business. in fact, came home everynight and continue work w/o dinner till past midnight. i think i earned back enough TOIL... haha lame lame.

and now that i have submited my work, just feel like stoning away and stone. haven't have that luxury the last few days. made me wonder how am i going to survive the peak period. i'll just run out of gas.... especially if i don't have my time at night just to spend with Him.

Watch this

2007-11-04T21:51:00.000+08:00

http://www.godtube.com/view_video.php?viewkey=ee73e63418003b47d7d5

Why I find life interesting

2007-10-31T20:24:00.000+08:00

There is a purpose and reason for things to happen. Be it good or bad. But in all situations, I must be content and hold on to what I believe in.
Tho I don't know the future, I know the One who holds my future - God. You may find it weird, but yeah, I don't know how my life would be like if I never knew Him - I wouldn't have a reason to live for, no hope.... what then is this life is we have nothing to live for? Surely not growing up, getting an education and a good job, then getting married, have kids, grow old.... then what? Wait to die?

Speaking of which, this is very true... my own grandma is old and weak. I went home last week and visited her many times. Everytime I see her, she would say to my mum, "You know how difficult is it? Want to die also cannot." My heart breaks to see her and hear her say that. She is so fragile and really, is waiting for her time to come.

Which brings me to think, isn't it so sad? Is life towards the end like this? Waiting to just die? Then what next?

This incident really reaffirms my faith. That life is more than going through the motion of life itself. I know that I have a destiny, a purpose to fulfill, a task (or in fact many tasks) to accomplish... and in the midst of going through all the trials and tribulations of life, I know that there is someone above watching over me. Someone to guide me, to reassure me and to love me.

And this is not just a one way thing.. but in return, my heart is so filled with thanksgiving that I want to tell others about this great Person. And that I also look forward to the day when my life here ends... so that I will be with Him forever.

A weird dream

2007-10-22T22:35:00.000+08:00

I was involved in a serious crime. I planned a robbery and had someone killed to cover it up... think it was an accidental death.

I ran, and tried to hide...

It was a really long night. I dreamt I ran... but there was just no where to hide! I suddenly felt remorseful and wished that the nightmare had not begun... That I could undo the things I had done. Wished I could return to where it all started. What was I even thinking? How could I do such a crime?

I remembered feeling extremely bad... no words could describe it. Then I woke up.

Obviously I didn't have a good sleep. As I was thinking through this weird dream, it was as though God was speaking to me...

That is how "sin" is. That is how heavy it feels. We can't take it away. We can't do anything about it.

"But you know what?" I felt God said. "I have taken them all away. My blood has cleansed you."

Then I came to realise that yes, God has given each of us a chance to begin life anew. A life where all your past are forgiven. Where He gives us another chance to life again... a new man.

That is what I am :)

Interesting video... do watch it till the end

2007-10-20T01:09:00.000+08:00

Another week has gone.... my thoughts

2007-10-20T00:47:00.000+08:00

Its amazing how fast time flies.... things just hits you at lightning speed!

This week was quite interesting. Went back to the client's place to do test of controls and walk through. Quite fun, but tedious.

Came back to office and found out that facebook has been banned! My goodness, the IT dept is super good. I know they will eventually know about it. Just like how they found we were using skype - and they found a way to uninstall it by itself! So now, back in office with no engagements for 3 weeks! Manz, how bored can that be? I feel more tired doing nothing.

But at least for now, when nobody pages for me or throw me something to do, I can learn mandarin. hahaa, found this website with quite a comprehensive and systematic way of learning www.chinese-tool.com . so hope to learn as much as I can.

Can u imagine that people actually think i speak mandarin more than english? faintzzz... that's why la, need to pick up more mandarin.

Anyway, thurs night, had my mentor group outing dinner at Grand Copthorne Hotel - cafe Brio's. Quite nic eto get to know more people in my group. We ate and talked till 11pm! goodness. FOod was ok, i like the dessert and salad :) and fondue.... k, first time trying it!

So, in my 3 months of work, I have eaten 2 buffets here. So Singaporean.... shop, eat... wat else is there? On another note, I saw a book at life bookshop. The title went "A 50 dollar buffet and a 25 cent meal". Being me, I picked it up and browse through it. the book was on 1side pcitures taken during the authors journey to 3rd world countries... and on the other side, his reflection.

My heart broke seeing the pictures. Many people are still so poor that they die because of hunger. Today's news report that almost a billion are still below poverty line...

and here we are splurging.

Some updates about me

2007-10-14T23:44:00.000+08:00

Workwise
The past week was quite hactic as we went down to a client's place and had t o finish our limted reivew work in 3 days as the partner wanted to reivew it by Friday. So piah every day till about 7.30pm everyday. Then I would rush off to attend a lecture at Trinity Theological College. 3 days in a row, had no dinner! think my waist got slimmer! haha

Churchwise
Attended an audition for the worship choir. Has a great time with the people there. We started off with a time of worship and it was great. Then each of us had to sing 2 songs; followed by test of technical skills. I was nervous till my voice shook! I say man...

Something firvilous.. had been eating fast food so often, i think i'm scared of it! especially kfc :S and also 2 days in a row i ate ice cream. how nice... think i piled on the calories again.

Manage to use this weekend to catch up with 2 dear people. We shared and talked... and its amazing that when people ask me how am i, i have so much to share and thank God for. We talked about work, direction in life, wat we want in life, relationships, God, church, cell, being in a foreign place etc etc.... But i guess even after hearing myself talk, i realize that my perception of life is quite different...

K, got to ciao.... catch me on facebook ppl. http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=596216613

New Start

2007-10-01T22:20:00.000+08:00

Sueanne makes a promise to Him.

She will remember a verse a day.
To study the Word diligently. No excuse. This will replace the time she spends on the internet.
She will pray and pray and pray!

I thank God for today. Went early to work today... to join a small gorup of believers to pray. How good God is. He saw that I longed to meet other believers who are working in the same office. And how He made the arrangements where totally beyond what I could think.

Usually, I'll be the one to start the initiative. But this time, I receive a sms from someone I didn't even know! Well, to cut the long story short, this person told me that there was a group which started meeting a week ago to pray! I was so excited!

Anyway, I hope that from this small group, we can encourage each other and hopefully go beyond praying. Perhaps launching out some activities to reach out to people - who knows like Christmas carol, lunch time fellowships etc.

Never despise the day of new beginnings. I still remember how we prayed in CCS everyday before school. Looking back, I didn't know what in the wide world drove us to do such thing. But I believe its the passion and youth - that could have run out as we grow older.... its the passion to see revival in this land once again.

Start in me.

Work

2007-09-29T22:03:00.000+08:00

Its been a really boring week in office. Really. Sitting at our work bench, waiting to be assigned something to do. I find it even more tiring than when I have a deadline to met. Man, just the thought of going to work, knowing that I have nothing to do really is... hmm what can I say haha

Apparently, only a minority of people have jobs. I mean for people at the same level as me. Others are just on ad-hoc basis. Sometimes, I wonder how they allocate the jobs. First of all, I'm in the smallest group in the audit department - meaning not many big jobs. And so far, my engagements are just a couple of weeks long. The longest being 3 weeks. And I have to admit I kinda screw up one of them. tho eventually I got it right... think its because I was blur and the person didn't give a very clear instructions. Darn. And that was just for interim. I guess the AIC was horrified... I haven't been assigned for that engagment in the finals. So there goes... hope to do better in my future engagements. But how to when I have not been assigned to many jobs? Sigh, pray that God will give me more chance to learn and improve.

The worse thing is that we have to do a self-appraisal at the end of the engagement. Hate doing such things. Never like to rate myself. Feel its like blowing your own trumpet if u rate it high.

So far, am working on being a salt and light in my workplace. Find it hard to talk about religion or personal beliefs. Lunch conversations are just work, this news, that news etc... Small little matters. But am praying that doors will be open and boldness to share the love of God. Am hoping for opportunities to have lunch with people personally to build bridges and get to know them better. Guess, that's how I function.

Sungai Buloh Wetlands Reserve

2007-09-22T20:59:00.000+08:00

The river flows to the Selat Tebrau... across is Johor Bahru. That was how near ulu we were!
Beautiful and quiet surroundings! For once, it felt like we were somewhere other than Singapore
Monitor lizard 1... so sua ku the first time we saw it
Saw this board everywhere. Thought it was warning us of crocs... but in the end, we think its monitor lizard.
Another point where we saw Johor
The path we hiked, went for 7km... 3 hours
Walking on the boardwalk... mangrove swamp. Too bad, low tide One of the many observatory hide...

Outdoor classroom... don't ask me what is it doing there

Saw many flora and fauna... spot the fish!

Red dragonfly!

Spot the mudskipper

Spot the squirell

Spot the bird

Bug.. colourful one

Tortoise in freshwater pond

Monitor lizard 2 on the tree - sleeping!

Some sort of creature (above) and some sort of pepper (below) - interesting!

The magnificent view from the watch tower - Aeria

The Aeria from a distance...

We came out through the Kranji Nature walk... another 2km... so in total 9km...oppss picture wrong way :p

Smile! For final photo... k, my hair looks like s***.

If you are wondering what camera.. ahem! its nikon :) satisfied with the pictures as some animals were so far away... had to zoom until its a digital zoom... yet pic is ok.

Wanna Be a Donkey?

2007-09-15T20:57:00.000+08:00

At first thought... of course no right? What for be an ass?

But do you know that God used a donkey to speak to one of the prophets of old. God used a donkey as His spokesperson!

And do you know that Jesus rode on a donkey when He entered Jerusalem? The donkey was a barrier of Jesus!

So want to be a "donkey" for Christ?

This thing also reminded me of the cell group I met in Japan. The cell group's name was Chiiroba - meaning young donkey. See, people elsewhere are willing to call themselves donkey too! When I heard that I was amazed. They were willing to lower themselves so low to be a called Chiiroba. And when asked why, it was the same reason as above.

That makes it the second time I heard that this year.... So yeah.

Some members of Chiiroba... sweet memories!

I'm Single and I make no apologies about it

2007-09-10T19:56:00.000+08:00

Yup, that's right :)

I got to admit that I was seriously hoping that my singlehood status to end soon. With some available guys in my life, my family is putting that pressure... you know what I mean. Even some close friends of mine want to conspire to match make me and someone!

But after last saturday's meeting by my church's singles ministry, I guess God spoke to me and reminded me... gave a a fresh perspective of singlehood.

For one, singlehood is just a phase. And like anything that happens, there is a time and purpose for every season. So singlehood is not something "unfortunate" - like how the world may think it is. No. It is a time of preparation, of character molding and self-discovery. Discovering God's plan for my own life, of making myself a better person - to be that helpmate to the man that God has prepared for me.

It is a time of just desiring God more. No distraction. Singlemindedness. A time of just loving Jesus more and more. Why? Cos we are His bridegroom.

I guess right now, I'm just thanking God for this reminder. As of now, I just want to love Him more and more and be more active in His kingdom work - many out there need the love of Christ!

Anyway, His love is prefect. What more could I ask?

Thank You Jesus!

Good to be home

2007-09-03T22:26:00.000+08:00

just came back today. took leave just to spend 3 days with my family back home. its great to see my home sweet home after 2 months of being away! good to see grandma and all my relatives.

and i got my PR approval already... haha... $200 for application, $43 for medical.... aiyo... wat more, kena pay CPF... tomorrow got to spend another few hours to queue and collect my PR..

first time i caught dad smiling on camera. he's holding my PR approval letter. hahaha... wonder wat was going through his mind :S

ciao.

Till I See You - United Live

2007-08-26T22:29:00.000+08:00

Verse 1

The greatest love that anyone could ever know

You overcame the cross and grave to find my soul

Till i see you face to face and grace amazing takes me home

I'll trust in you

With all I am I'll live to see Your kingdom come

And in my heart I pray You'd let Your will be done

And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home

I'll trust in You

Chorus

I will live to love You

I will live to bring You praise

I will live a child in awe of You

Verse 2

You are a voice that called the universe to be

You are the whisper in my heart that speaks to me

And till I see You face to face and grace amazing takes me home

I'll trust in you

Bridge

You alone are God of all

You alone are worthy Lord

And with all I am my soul will bless Your name

Hosanna - Hillsongs

2007-08-26T22:01:00.000+08:00

I see the king of glory

Coming down the clouds with fire

The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes

I see his love and mercy

Washing over all our sin

The people sing, the people sing

Chorus

Hosanna, hosanna

Hosanna in the highest

I see a generation

Rising up to take the place

With selfless faith, with selfless faith

I see a new revival

Staring as we pray and seek

We're on our knees, we're on our knees

Bridge

Heal my heart and make it clean

Open up my eyes to the things unseen

Show me how to love like you have loved me

Break my heart for what is yoursEverything I am for your kingdom's cause

As I walk from earth into eternity

Managing my stuff

2007-08-21T20:37:00.000+08:00

Working life - more responsibility

Yup.

Have to manage my own finances for one thing. Just sat down to plan my spending. Realise that I have to spend prudently in order to clear my study loan. That's my first goal financially. Be debt free. Also to give some of my pay to my parents....

Less time during weekdays.
Gave up on having social meetings during weekdays. Sometimes, they'll just throw me something t odo at the last minute and there goes my night! So for now, can't have any meetings planned after work.

But good news is that I have my weekends free! Yay, can meet people...so far been using it to meet some. But on the other hand, they are also very busy people. Sighz... I don't want to be alone during weekend. God, please send people :)

And I have my PR approved! Need to plan my time, and hopefully take time off to finalize my submition. Stupid...need to take leave just to queue at ICA.

Need to plan my leave too! Haha, if God will, I may go China in Nov :) (tho I told Him once, Pls don't ever send me to that country!)

Also, I remember praying about a ministry that I should join in church. But looking at the rate that I stay late and how unpredictable my OT can be.... think this will have to be onhold. Unless its an adhoc basis or just serving on Sunday...maybe ushering? haha..see how

A10 Core training

2007-08-14T22:03:00.001+08:00

Fellow A10s at the end of our 2 weeks of core training. Most of us fresh and eager to start work?! haha, no way.... now that I am into the 4th week of work... got to admit, still blur...

My dear group members! Justin, Chee Onn, Edwin, Wei Khim. Ruolin and Jia Hui.

NDP Fireworks

2007-08-13T00:07:00.000+08:00

Had my first public holiday! Tot get to rest, but spent a few hours working! My colleague called me to discuss work.. manz ... but glad the engagment is over after 3 long weeks. Moving on to the next one.

Anyway, met Lan to catch up and see her France photo. Makes me really want to travel overseas.

Sheer madness! Just look at the people behind. City hall was jam packed with people.

End of MEET

2007-07-28T22:56:00.000+08:00

Yup, today is officially the last MEET (Missions Education and Exposure Training) meeting. And considering that our batch will be the last batch for this program, it is really the last. MEET will be changed to G3 - God, Glory, Gospel.

My heart is filled with thanksgiving and I really stand in awe of Him.

Thank Him for seeing me through this year. Having to balance study and a huge commitment to this program - it was not easy, but looking back, it was really all worth it. His grace has trully, trully been sufficient. And thinking back, it was exactly the same verse my M'ca pastor gave me just before I left to study here. I think my life is trully a testimony of God's grace and goodness. Just that many times, I forget to count my blessings. We are so forgetful people... we must learn to count them one by one. Then we will realise how good God has been, will be and always is.

I thank God for the friendships made. Maureen, Shirlene and Annie. Thanks girls! I really enjoyed the time we had in throughout this MEET journey. Hope we continually keep each other accountable.

I thank God that it realligned, reconfirmed my worldview...whatever you call it. I've always been inspired by missionaries. Having gone through MEET, I learnt a lot more on missions. Too much, can't be written into words.

I guess the main challenge now for me is where do i go from here? Now that I know how missions is THE heartbeat of God and the general call for us is to go into all the world to preach the gospel... what changes am I gonna make in my life?

I hope that years down the road, I won't be caught up in the rat race of life. Building myself a career, earning tons of money...yup, these are blessings from God, but I hope that it will not become a restrain, that restircts me from obeying God's command to go serve Him in whatever way He wants me too.

So for now, as I am still settling down into working life, I pray that I will live life with a mindset that I am at God's disposal. To live a simple life, not to take too deep roots... To constantly remind myself of the greater calling God has upon our lives... to live for His glory.

Praying that I will learn to live out my testimony. So that it becomes so obvious that God lives in me. In my conduct, my speech etc.

And also to keep myself updated about missions. Am still wondering ow to go about this.

Support those in the field and Christian organisations helping out in Creative Access Nations.

I guess having Christ is so worth everything that all else is rubbish. My team just had a TBS on Paul, the making of a missionary. And doing a background study on Paul, he is trully a guy who seemed to had everything in his time. He's really there... you know what I mean. Yet, after his encounter with Christ, he was totally changed. He suffered so much for the sake of the gospel. Ended up as a prisoner. Tragic the world may think.

Also reminded of the many people who gave their lives for His sake. Jim Elloit and his 4 friends who died trying to reach out to the Aucas. Tragic, in the world's view. But see the fruit out of this event. The Aucas have now been saved.

Just pray that I will run this race well. That at the end of it, when I meet Him, He will say well done, good and faithful servant.

Graduate

2007-07-25T22:46:00.001+08:00

That's me! Can't believe time flies! I'm the only one wearing a long skirt! haha...

Anyway, life is not that great upon graduation. Earn money, but huge repsonsibility. And in auditing, what can be better! I worked till 8.30 on m first day and 10pm on the second.

And i really hope that Mr. Right will come soon.... sometimes i wonder why all the good guys are taken while those available (and fits my criteria) just say "pray about it"? Maybe because I'm the kind to also pray about it hahaha! and it saddens me that those I kinda liked and wished could be the one has been "taken away"....pray that only God will bring us together if it really is His will.

*sorry about my language cos no time to write properly!

i need to cheer up!

2007-07-23T22:39:00.000+08:00

am feeling bit discouraged. guess cos its first day on the job.... i was thrown work and expected to complete it. i was not very sure how to go about it. but i tried. took quite a long time.

did cash section. couldn't finish as not all the bank statements were available.

did FOREX reasonable testing. completed it.

P/L items. was given the thing and i don't know much about the company. how to audit? blur... will continue on wednesday. maybe by then it'll get better..maybe today i'm down because i feel overwhelmed.

worked till 8.30pm. no dinner! what the heck. is my life going to be like that? I miss T&E in church today. totally forgot about my appointment with Christine ,that she called me one hour later to ask where am I? pengsan!! I really dunno how to justify myself.

think its all the fatigue that is accumulating.... been sleeping less than 6 hours the whole of last week. and weekend was just so busy! burnt! doing MEET video.... but still we couldn't get it done for FOC.

and also feeling sad that i left my friend who called me on sunday morning to say she wanted to come to church with me! i was elated. but she was late for the shuttle and i left without her. i did that cos someone else was with me (going to chruch too) and she didn't want to meet my other friend. was torn. just pray that God will give me another chance.

anyway, tmr is my convo. I should cheer myself up.

Some updates about me

2007-07-14T22:27:00.000+08:00

I've started work already.... in Deloitte, S'pore as an audit asst. Been attending trainning for the last 2 weeks, one more to go...then I'll be out in the field working.

Am adjusting to my new environment.... colleagues, schedule. Been busy lately with my MEET report and all, there's just not much time for my ownself... like exercise, blogging etc. Hmmph hopefully I'll settle down soon.

Thank God for the new friends I made among my A10s. Just hope that as I tackle this new relationship called "colleague" I'll be able to know how to form lasting friendships from here. Just don't know how deep people want to know each other. But hey, I'm hoping to form friendships, not just colleagues or acquiantances. Though I know it is a delicate balance, since this is the corporate world and sometimes, its vicious! Never know...as we are all competing...but I never look at things this way... just that I've been warned. Hmm.. that's why I'm praying for wisdom as I explore this "colleague" relationship.

Also, am hoping that I will be salt and light. Am struggling with my own spiritual walk. In my first week, it really dawned on me how easy it is to just fall away as a Christian. How easy it is for my heart to grow cold. I just pray and sincerely ask God to grant me grace through out my life, especially as an auditor. Pray that the things I've seen in Japan, the lives of the Christians there will also remind me of how Christ is worth living for. Pray that God will continue to remain very real to me... that I will be constantly be aware of His presence.

Glad for the time spent with Rhoda. It was really a good chat and a time of encouraging each other spiritually...hope to do it more often.

And my convocation is on 24 July at 2pm. Sad... only parents coming. CF friends will be in FOC, cell members at work... bro and sis got class. What kind of timing is that? Of course only my batchmates will be around... at least something.

Being domesticated

2007-06-19T11:19:00.000+08:00

Trying to pass away time fruitfully...

Had my sebaceous cyst on my faced removed on Friday.. My have 3 stickes on my face! Looks more like a huge mole from far, since the thread is black! Taking it off tomorrow.

Made apple pie on Saturday. At the first attempt..quite pleased that it turn out quite well. Haha.. tastes as nice as it looks.. muahaha.

Sunday, celebrated Fathers' Day with the church... just that my dad wasn't around. He was on a mission trip to Kelantan. Made ice cream in the afternoon. Learnt the recipe from our Japanese host. With the help of my sis, we made 4 tubs with different flavours each! Original, Milo, Appricot and Choc Chips! Too bad no pictures.

Monday, made a trip to Singapore to visit my company and apply for PR. Then house searching.

Today, will be cooking lunch for my family! First time... and will be cooking Hokkaido stew which I bought back from Japan. Hope it turns out nice!

Am also rotting away at home, watched 3 X-men back to back. Not to mention 3 CSI back to back too. Hahaha...

Photo

2007-06-08T16:22:00.000+08:00

Saw cherry blossom in the first week there. Thank God for keeping it for us! THe weather was nice.. cool, sometimes cold. Think will melt here in Singapore and Malaysia. We also saw how the season changed over the 4 weeks. From no leaves, to buds and young leaves with fresh green, to dark green. We also saw mountains still covered with snow.

We took many many photos.. in total like 2.2GB!

Haven't sorted them yet.

Back from Sapporo

2007-06-08T15:52:00.000+08:00

Just arrived Singapore at 1.45pm today.

Haven't used internet for so long... bit disconnected from current events, my "life" in Singapore. I had a very very good time in Japan. Many thoughts. But just want to say that I'm glad to be home. Yet, missing Sapporo- the people, culture and just living there. Was afraid of coming home. Cause I know that I have to get back to my own skin, my life - the worries and getting back to routine. Never like routines.

Yet, I know every mountain top experience has its end, where we have to come down and share it with others. So I pray that I may share and encourage others.

The exposure trip was great indeed. Now that Japan is over, am asking God where do I go from here? Tough questions. There are many things God spoke to me, I think, and many things I'm thinking over. Only time will tell whether what I am thinking of is from God or my own. Ask me in a few years time.

If time permits, I'll blog about the trip. But currently, busy... many things to do - my job, PR appllication, convocation, house searching, church camp.

Updates From Sapporo!

2007-05-19T08:56:00.000+08:00

It has been one week since arriving here in Sapporo. My team and I have adjusted to the weather and people here. We thank God for being with us here. I also thank God for healing me of my sore throat and fever.

What we have done the past week:

Saturday
Kid’s club where we played and cooked lunch (BBQ) with the children

Sunday
Church service; outing with the church’s Youth group to see some sakura; prepared hainanese chicken rice and dinner with the Youth group

Monday
Fellowship with a cell group (5 ladies in their retirement years) – went to Hira Oka Park with them where we saw even more sakura and plum. After that we had a picnic lunch with them in the park.
We cooked katsu curry for dinner
Dinner and interview with KGK director, Mr Shimada. He is the sole full time worker of IFES here in Hokkaido. He shared with us the student movement here in Japan and the challenges and struggles working here. Its sad to see that the laborers are few indeed.
After dinner, we joined the KGK meeting where about 20 university students gathered for their monthly intervarsity meeting. We had a Q&A session with them where they asked us anything about the life (and being a Christian) in Singapore and the difference between the 2 countries.

Tuesday
Conducted English lesson for where we have 3 students for the morning session and 4 students in the afternoon. Some of the students are non Christians and it is their first time coming to church. English lesson is one of the main outreaches the church uses to draw non Christians.

We took the subway to the town center, Odori. The city is very unique – the buildings are
in blocks and there is a beautiful park in the middle of town. Visited the CLC bookstore. The bookstore is a form of ministry to encourage Christians to read Christian literature and to reach out. It’s sad to hear that 2 out of 5 stores had to close due to slow economy and the lack of desire of Christians to read materials. The used to have someone to go round in a car – “mobile bookshop” but it also stopped due to lack of manpower.

At night, we visited the KGK on Hokkaido University for Bible study. There was about 15 students, with 2 non-Christians. It is interesting to note that many are seeking Christ, but not ready to commit themselves to Him. Pray that God in His time will convict their hearts.

Wednesday
English lesson in the morning.
Visited the Hokkusei University KGK. Had lunch with them and a short time of sharing and prayer for one another.

Thursday
English lesson in the morning.

During our lunch break, we headed to Sapporo University to talk to a Christian professor, Mr Mitugi. He shared that the university he works in is a non-Christian university, unlike Hokusei University. Therefore anything relating to religion is not allowed. He cannot share the gospel to his students and his only way is through being a good testimony. He hopes that students will approach him when facing problems and through this way share about Jesus Christ. There are only 7 Christians there (5 staff, 2 students). The only Christian group there is made out of 2 people – himself and a student, whom we met on our first day here. He asks us to pray that there will be a spiritual desire to pray more, to pray till there is a breakthrough in Japan.

English lesson in the afternoon. We usually teach, one to one. In the hope that we will build relationship with them and to encourage them to join us for Sunday service. The last 10 minutes, all the students will gather together, where each of us will take turns to share our personal testimony (one day, one sharing). Today was my turn. I shared Jeremiah 29:11 – about how knowing God had changed my life; that God had given me this verse and it assures me that God has my future laid ahead and that I don’t have to worry about it.

After lesson, we visited the Samaritan Home, a halfway home for alcoholics. Talked to an instructor there about the program and how they help ex-alcoholics recover. It is a non-profit organization and the board of directors are all Christians. It is another form of how Christians here are reaching out to the community. Singapore also has one – the Hiding Place, which we went last December as one of the training program under MEET.

At night, we had dinner in one of the church member’s house. We fellowshipped with a Japanese lady, Ms Tomoko. She is by profession, as nurse and is serving the Lord in China, for 11 years now, under MSI (www.msips.org). She is fluent is Japanese, Chinese and English. This organization is a Christian organization. Volunteers go to third world countries as tent-makers, under reasons such as providing medical and community services, teaching vocational and English classes. Though they are not allowed to share the gospel (and many will not do so, so as not to risk themselves from being kicked out of the country), they spread the gospel by being a good testimony, in the hope that the people will ask them about the gospel. MSI is open for short-term trips. Those with skills can sign up and go. But it is pure voluntary work. No pay.

Friday
We visited the OMF office. The director gave us a lecture about OMF and its ministry and strategy in reaching out to the people. We met a Singaporean couple there. It is really encouraging as I met them during one of the OMF prayer meetings in Frankell Bethesda. During that prayer meeting, the couple and another 2 ladies shared their burden and why they felt God calling them to Japan. It’s really encouraging to see them taking the step of faith to come out here for 2 years. They are now taking the language course by OMF, to get to know the culture and language before being sent to other parts of Japan to serve.

Our schedule is not very tight. There is plenty of time to rest and just to get to know my team members better. Think I am eating a lot too! Cause my Team Leader is very picky about food and Shirlene eats very little. Only left me and Maureen to finish the food. And since we don’t want to waster food and to show our appreciation, the both of us would just eat lor! Got nickname – tong sampah (garbage bin!) Apparently I am the most cin-cai person when it comes to food. Haha, they say I can be a missionary since I can easily adapt to food.

Among the things that I am thinking about after talking to so many people and interacting with them:
- The gospel has been here for a few hundred years now, almost the same time as Korea. Korea has seen a tremendous growth in the number of people being saved. But Japan is still struggling to reach out and the percentage of Evangelical Christians is 0.7%. Why?
- The most common way used to reach out is to first build relationships with the Japanese. Conventionally, Christians use English lessons, various classes with the housewives. At the university level, they use Bible study. Many seekers join them and in fact, many know about Christ, but have yet given their lives to Him. It is really time-consuming and sometimes they do not bear results. But is this model of reaching out still relevant? It has been effective in the past, but will it still work? Japan has been undergoing many changes in their society, and should there be a more aggressive way of reaching out?
- What model should be adopted in reaching out? The OMF director shared his opinion. He also said that it is time for the church to truly differentiate what are the biblical church practices and what is not, what is cultural and not etc.
- I see that the Japanese are very hardworking people. Many will not have time to pray (for Christians) and to commit to as a Christian, such as attending church. How should the church reach out and make an impact here?Looking around, I think there is a need to pray for the outpouring of His Spirit here in Japan. The Christians here need to be filled with power from on high to continue in their faith and to be His testimony. The land needs the Holy Spirit, it needs a spiritual breakthrough. More prayer needed for Japan!

I'm mentally drained

2007-05-08T23:20:00.000+08:00

My parents think I am stressed...more than during exam period.

Began my search for a place to stay after exams...in addition to clearing my stuff, packing, shifting and preparing for my mission trip.

For example, yesterday was the start of exco retreat. 9am left room, went to Agape Methodist for meeting till 1pm. Lunch, came back to room to shift books to NUS (and sell them BEFORE AGM). Reach there at 5.15pm, 15 minutes earlier, but no one was there (suppose to start at 5.45pm). And when the people came, they just went straight into the AGM. NO time to browse books.

K, great... after much thinking, we decided to just wait till it was over and grab hold of those leaving. Also decided to give them away free as we didn't want to have any leftovers. But in the end it turns out that even free stuff was not enough to get them to go home with a book in hand.

I left at 10pm. Thank GOd for Shawn and Sam who was with me. Didn't know what I would do without them! Reached home at 11pm. Slept 2am.

Following morning was MEET, 9am in NUS...go there again!

Sometimes, I feel unappreciated. All the effort I put in. ANd some take me forgranted. But then God reminded me that isn't that the self talking. I should put others before me. Jesus came as a servant... was just memorizing Phi 2. Think what can be a more appropriate time than this to internalize this.

And the second thing which is driving me nuts is looking for a place. I thought I had found it. After following the classifields everyday, calling endless numbers .. talking, and viewing two places ...$1100, basic furniture, direct bus to office n church, 24 hour foodcourt downstairs, owner that was willing to wait 1.5 months for me. But my friend was not comfortable with the idea of $550 every month..

And I just got back from another viewing today. To cut everything short, I'm not in a very good mood now. Property prices are shooting like nobody's business... owners who are using this to their advantage n having superior bargaining power... And to deal with agents.. And other people who are also looking for a place but have no problem with budget...
its pushing me beyond what I can handle.. plus my parents here. I appreciate them coming down but it also adds another party whom I have to please.

Was worried, stressed.. whatever. Mum reminded me that God will provide. We have someone others don't have - God with us, our God who is Jehovah Jireh. He knows I need a place. He knows I will be away to bring His gospel elsewhere. He has proven He is more than able to provide (an obvious example, MEET fund has surplus of more than 10% our original target). He has given me a hostel room to stay the whole 3 years of my uni life... which I was also quite stressed about, worried that I will not have enough points to get a room. Bu tHe gave me a place to stay and I didn't even have to move out and got my room way in the first round.

I think I am yet in another test of how much I can trust Him. Lord, teach me to surrender my everything to You and be more concern not about this earthly dwelling but the eternal one. Teach me to trust You... just as You've provided for all those who seek You first. The testimony of so many people I read, like George Muller, Hudson Taylor that is still fresh in my memory...

Sueanne, Trust in Me, says the Lord.

Yes, God, I will put my trust in You.

I experienced a twister!

2007-05-06T20:04:00.000+08:00

Can you believe it? A twister hit Melaka when I was back home. Yah, refer to the earlier blog.... haha.. I found out it was a TWISTER! It hit Taman Aman, exactly my taman... Canossa Convent, my secondary school... I was joking with my sis.. haha, that if I had not been such a coward, I could have gone out and peep to see the twister. Oh well... whatever.. but heh, I'm proud to say I experienced one.

From the Star Twister Hits Parts of Malacca

Man... the world climate is getting crazy.... due to us humans. Stop the pollution people... use less paper, save the tress!

Outing

2007-05-05T20:19:00.000+08:00

Exam is OVER! Kiss it goodbye for the time being...yeah, time being only, not forever...cos people say learning is a lifetime, and being in the accounting business, sure will have exams to come.

Anyway, spend wednesday clearing my notes. Realise that after 3 years, I have collected a lot of stuff. haha... clearing and sorting like never ending... and today is saturday, and i must say i still haven't finish :p

Thursday was spent really Ada Lum's Hitchhiker's guide to missions (in preparation for my trip), Shining Like Stars (about student ministry worldwide). Exam over, but still a lot to read. Dinner with MEET groupmates. We're excited, leaving next week! Yet at the same time , anxious, not knowing what to expect. Its gonna be a total foreign place. Living seperately from each other for a week (homestay experience, which includes cooking for our host family :S )

Friday.... long day, left my rom at 9.45am, came back at 11.45pm. Spiderman 3 at GVMax, vivocity. Place was superb. Very HUGE screen which makes things more dramatic. Sound system even made the place shook and I could feel my clothes vibrate! Movie was fantastic. I loved it. Filled with action, entertaining and to see how the characters grew.

Lunch at Food Republic...very nice set up.

After the movie, went for lunch and walk around vivo. And we visited Toysrus. I haven't been there for years! Saw rows and rows of toys. Was amazed to even see that my favourite toy....

LEGO is still in the market!

PlayDoh too! Wow...

And of course la, Barbie is still there too.

I felt that I was having flashback of my childhood. Remembering the toys we played.

The little kid in Mabel was revealed :)

Okok, I was also being a kid. We saw this huge bear-bear, almost the size of Mabel! haha... and I must hug it!

And the puppets were so cute! The lion was so adorable :)

I had a fantastic time! Because of the good company :)

Later went straight to cell group. Youwei had this funny thing that happened to him. He was approached by an agent to be a model for men's wear! k, we all had a good laugh bout it... hahahha

Unforgetable

2007-04-30T19:19:00.000+08:00

Went home from Thursday to Monday :) Will be my last trip home for the next 40 over days as I'll be leaving to Japan from Singapore.

Had a fantastic time... tho I have ONE more final, final paper to go...muahaha
- great food.... had ikan bakar, hawker food, oyster noodle, banana leave... ooooo, yummy! Ate until my stomach couldn't take it. As you can see, I miss malaysian food. It rocks!!
- lots of TV... watched American Idol (Idol Gives Back), CSI, and a movie (Pursuit of Happyness)
- lots of time with my family... priceless

Idol gives back was fantastic. Cos it was different. It was great to see that the show finally did something to help those really in need. It really moved my heart to see so many, many children suffer in America (yes, America!) and Africa.. mainly because of AIDS. It remided me again of how often we take forgranted the very food we eat (when so many are dying of extreme hunger and poverty), how many people still struggle to just live each day (when others have so much money we just store them away or spend on "luxury" items)... yes, one day, when I have the earning power, I'll mae sure people like these are not forgotten.

Pusuit of happyness was an inspiring show. How Chris Gardner a single homeless father made it to become a slef-made millionaire. Lesson learnt - we need perseverance, lots of them, to make it in life.

Yesterday night was a terrible night. I admit that after watching CSI:NY, I was a little spooked. haha... then thunder and lightning started. K, I got to say that until now, I'm still a little frightened of thunderstorms at night! Yah, then it started to rain. About midnight, there was sudden gust of wind, for a few seconds it blew...so freaking! The windows in my house started slamming one by one, plus the sound w00000woooooooooowooooooooooooo...... I could hear things flying around! Car alarms went off. I freaked. Thank God, my father was still awake. hehe..

Anyway, the wind was so, so, so strong. First time in my life, I experienced it. After the wind clamned, mum (who was awaken by the wind), dad and myself peeped out of our balcony and we could see our neighbours coming out to inspect the damage. One even asked another neighbour if his Astro dish was still intact. hahaha.. of all things, his concern was the satelite dish. Our huge flower pots got blowned down. There were leaves everywhere. Even in my room! Not to mention rain that came in and the wind that blew my window wide open!

Thank God, I slept.

This morning, mum went round the neighbourhood to see what happened. Apparently, many houses with zinc roof got the roofs blown away. Could see debris all over the road.

Our roof also had two huge holes. Weird, cos our house didn't experience any leakage over the night. We thought no damage to the house. Our immediate neighbours' roof also got blown away and the had water pouring in. But we didn't. Hmmm... two holes on the roof, but no water came in. Miracle? Must be God's protection. My God is good.

My Jumbled Thoughts

2007-04-26T00:50:00.000+08:00

3 papers down and 1 more to go! 2 more weeks before I leave for Japan.

Hmmm, many things happened.

Cell group
We continued on the topic of judgement. How would God judge us? How faithful we had been with the things He had given us (mina - for things which are given equally to all, and talents - for what we know as talents); whether we had done the will of the Father; what we have built - if it of material that will last or that will be burnt in the fire. Many other things but these were the main points we discussed.
So how am I living? Am I ready to face the jugdement? Yes, God our Father is gracious, merciful etc, yet, let us not forget that He is also righteous and holy.

One quiet time
I just started my prayer by just exalting God and its amazing how He led me to pray for great things. Prayed specifically for student ministries worldwide.

Have been haviung weird weird dreams almost everynight. Yesterdays, was terrifying... God, please sanctify my dreams :S Hmmm wonder how they even come about.

There is someone I'm praying about.... need a clear direction from Him if this is from Him.

Also, I shared with my MEET sup.. how life has been getting on. Here are what I have seived, out of the sharing
- missions is very important in God's plan. It is His salvation plan,. Ultimately, it is for His glory (which I have so forgotten). And yes, I see the importance, and I want to be part of it.
- but I am soon stepping into the corporate world. Feel that currently that is His directions for me. But in the long run, my desire is still to serve Him, though I don't see myself entering the full time ministry. I think more towards serving Him full time, yet having a secular job. yups.
- also praying for a suitable companion. however, as I was sharing with her, this pressure of finding one... I am wondering if it is me feeling society's pressure to conform once you have come of age, or what. hmmm, anyways, I am available but yet not as I am praying about this area.

MEET update:
- trip is 10 May to 8 June
- itenary: church and KGK visits, english lessons, homestay and country side visit
- target: other than Japanese, the international community
- got our VISA already, praise God
- target of funds: almost met, praise Him
Prayer needs:
- language (Japanese and Chinese needed... really need to brush up!)
- sensitivity to the Holy Spirit, to be able to encurage the church there. Basically the church and the Japan generally needs a spiritual breakthrough.
- unity of the team: Annie, Maureen and Shirlene. Honestly, I don't know how much they are preparing spiritually for the trip, other than the training we went under the program.

Yup, that's all for now... going home for the weekend to study and see home as I will be away for quite a while.

Eventful Week

2007-04-14T21:11:00.000+08:00

Sunday
Resurrection Sunday! My Saviour is alive, there is eternal life in Him.
Met Delia, my sup, and had a long chat... yeah, talk from my future, how MEET had impacted me, how I am challenged to make my life different... well, lots of things!

Monday
Mummy came down to visit me. Took a walk in Orchard.

Tuesday
Japanese listening test! Argh, nearly faint la, the speed of their conversation... How am I going to survive one month there?
Whisper in the rain - a short message by Ps Lip Yong on how knowing God gave a sense of purpose and fulfilment. To discover ourselves and to find a meaningful life is to know our Creator and therefore we will find our purpose.. no need to search elsewhere. Hmmm, he shared a testimony of his life. And left us with 3 important decisions we will ever make in life:
1. Whether we will accept Chirst as our personal Lord and Saviour (it will determine if we go heaven or hell)
2. Whom we will marry (reason: as above!)
3. How we will live this life. What kind of person will we be

Wednesday
Just realize I have 1 more week to my exam! Immediately started revision... oh no, hope I can finish. Been telling myself still got time and now no time already!

Thursday
Final presentation. Wasted $11 on a little cream for an ulcer. What?!

Friday
Revision! Pray I can finish man. Some people already finish revision.
Cell group :) Jiayong shared on judgment. Everyone will be judged by God. Judgement is not just punishment but also a time to receive our reward. There is no partiality and for us believers it will be based on our works. Did we build with gold, silver, precious stones or wood, hay, stubble? How are we building our lives?
My sandals snaped on the way to cell group and I had to drag my right sandals around the area looking for a replacement! Thank God I remembered there's a shoe shop nearby. Got a pair of slippers for $6.90!
Also, got good news... new addition coming in Nov! Congrats to Jiayong and Aili.

Saturday
All the way to Orchard AGAIN to submit visa application. Wasted 3 hours to and fro, when I am in panic mood of whether I can finish my textbook! Just pray that all will go well and that we can fly.

k, back to my book. Last chapter. I can do it!

The People I Thank God For...

2007-04-13T00:28:00.000+08:00

My Project Team mates....
AA101 - Josiah, Yuen Ho, Qiu Ting, Carriene Kho
OB - Qiu Ping, Wei Khim, Germaine, Zhi Hui, Wendy Chia
FM - Chang Loong, Geo Suan

AA102 - Anita M, Joyce Tan
Biz Law - Clydina, Hui Fang, Rachel Yeo

AA201 - Anita M, Charissa, Kai Lin
AA202 - Zesi, Chuan Lee, Angela Yeo, Shi Jia/Jackie
AA305 - Shirley, Janet
AC213 - Qiying, Janet

AA205 - Timothy Yeo, Sue Min, Oi Lam, Gwen
AB214 - Joleen, Edward, Ying Hui
AB112 - Zhi Hui, Shi Xian, Anesia, Chin Yee, Lih An
AC313 - Jasmine/Xuan Harn, Johnny, Miao Yi
PA - Zhong Yi, Clara Yap

AA206 - Lee Fang, Celine, Janet, Yu Fang
AA304 - Zhi Yuan, Gwen, Wendy Sim, Zhen Bin
AA306 - Serene Chen, Chun Xin, Anesia
BL247 - Renita, Nina

AB311 - Keat Wee, Kai Lin, Hui Bing
AB301- Gabriel, Hui Pin, Florence, Li Ping
BL248- Lee Ting
BH324 - Viknesh, Thu Huong, Lee Ting, Alvin

All my tutorial mates
ECA: NTU Red Cross CIP, Hall 9 scrabble team of 04/05, some CCF & ISCF
Roomies: Hong Anh, NanHui, Ngoc, Rhoda (thank you for being a friend)
Cornerstone Tertiary : Kim, Leon, Tze Shan, Liena, Abigial, Faye, Jian Liang (really enjoyed the times of prayer, but really regret I couldn't make it for so many!)
Most of all.... my closest friends made in ntu - CFers! Vivi, Mabel, Christine, Kristy, Nat, You He, Steven, Wed CG, and all members ..you're like my family here

Thank God, for the many people He brought into my life. Really appreciate them all. Though I never did show it outwardly nor even sometimes acknowledge it, I really do.

Leaving this place soon.... if I had the chance to live through ntu again, I would
- make more friends... my hall neighbours, tutorial mates. I wouldn't be so introverted
- join campus crusade
- faithfully attend tertiary prayer, start a prayer group in hall
- share the gospel to more people
- find a suitable life partner? hahahahha lol! maybe not here in ntu!

Could I Ever

2007-04-06T13:37:00.000+08:00

by Planet Shakers 2004

Verse 1:
When I woke up today
And thought of all the things You’d done
I find myself here
Feeling oh so overcome

Pre-Chorus:
You gave Your life away for me
Truly my heart belongs to You
So let me say

Chorus:
How could I ever thank You for
What You did at Calvary
When You bled and died for me
How could I ever turn away
Knowing that You paid the price
That I could never pay

Verse 2:
When I think of the way
That You died upon that Cross
Bearing my sin

Today is the day we remember the greatest love of all. This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down His life for us (1 John 3:16). This love never fails. It will never forsake us. Who can ever grasp how great this love is.

Abba Father, thank You for Your salvation plan for us. Thank You that You gave us hope through Jesus. That we can look towards having eternal life with You.

Thank You Jesus, for taking all my sins away. Thank you that through what You've done, I am free. You've given me a whole new purpose for living.

I can't imagine life without knowing You. You are my everything...

Am I Called?

2007-04-01T15:56:00.000+08:00

by Alan Neech. My summary... keepinig this.. who knows I will need to remind myself in future.

Being called involves separation and sacrifice. Christ called men to self-denial and self-giving. The cost may seem to great initially but He also promised certain things to those who choose to obey.

How do you assess a call? The need (work that needs to be done) and your ability to meet that need. The principle found throughout the Bible is a missionary principle. Its total thrust is on Mission (from the Latin word missus = sent). God sent patriachs, prophetsm preachers and His Son. He still sends and sends those whom He calls.

God reaches heart and will through showing us human need.
He challenges us with the examples of others who have responded to His call and are doing His work.
He prepares us through circumstances and personal equipment to be able to do certain tasks.
He puts continuing pressure on our consciences until we are unable to escape giving a response.
He gives us some of His own deep concern for those without knowledge of Him.
Our love for Him, springing from an ever-deepiening sense of gratitude for His love to us, contrains us to only want to do what He wants.
Obedience to His will is a true missionary call.

We ought to have one, single, overriding incentive in our lives - to do the Fathers will. A Christian whereever he is, whatever position he is in should be able to say that he is where and is doing what he does because he believes that God has put him there.

Resons for a call - we are al l unworthy to do His service unless God calls us. We need to be certain that God wants us to be where we are, doing that. Because out there in the field, trials, hardships and many things will come against our way. We ust be willing to carry on, sometime struggle to hang on because we know God has called.

What kind of people hear God's call to service (missionary or ect)?
Those who are likely to hear are mot so much to do wtih the head as much as with the heart. Some qualities:
- servant heart, humility
- bearing witness to his faith in his own country where he is
- personal knowledge and experience of Jesus Christ
- spiritaul and self discipline
- determination
- ability to go well with others
- willingness to loose temporal possessions
- teachability
- sense of humour
Take heart. God equip those He calls, and will help you grow in all those places you're weak now. Just listen to Him!

How can I be sure that God is calling me?
God will confirm His call by inward peace, by opening ways, by removing difficulties (though sometimes it is deliberate to what we are made of), by supplying our needs and by granting faith, courage and determination needed to be obedient to Him.
Here is what the author summarize it: When people fall in love, some begin by wondering whether it is possible; then they feel that it may be so; and at last they are convinced it is true and they make the lifelong promise of marriage. Others literaly fall in love and every passing day only so confirms their certainty. A (missionary) call is not so different, For some it is a growing conviction. For others a sudden decision leading to conviction.
But one thing that is always true. Never be hasty. Wait on the Lord.

The author also believes in long term calls and not short term. Its a no good for ordinary people to go short term missions (unless it is for exposure) as it may do more harm than good. It takes time to learn the language, culture and people and just to adapt before becoming effective. Unless of course you have a specialized skill (eg doctors etc).

40 more days to go!

2007-03-31T17:16:00.000+08:00

Annie, my team leader was counting... yup, 40 more days to go before embarking on my first cross-cultural mission trip. Do pray that we will all be prepared spiritually. To be in tuned with His Spirit. Don't want it to be just a holiday trip or something. But that during the month long trip, we will be a blessing to the Japanese, and that God will also speak to us while we are there. Who knows what can happen. This is it! After months of Bible Study and preparation. Also pray that we will touch our fund raising target.... If God moves your heart to give :)

And can't believe its less than 3 weeks to exam! The end is near. Pray that I pass this semester and get my degree. Don't know if I can make it to ****** upper... sighz

Then am also starting to prepare myself for my next phase of live. First thing, to get a place to stay. God, please open a way. Then, to get a PR or something. Can't live on student pass anymore. What a coincidence that I checked the website on how to obtain PR or employment pass yesterday. And this morning my dad dreamt that I was so happy that I got PR status! Errr.... I don't know what it means... but you know, sons and daughters shall see visions, old men dream dreams.... :S

I don't know what God has planned for me. Should I continue staying on here? I don't know.... In cell we were sharing about visions, as in goals etc. To strife towards God's vision and call for each of our lives. Have been praying about it recently. Coming to crossroads in life again. Don't want to just go with the flow, but to go where God wants me to go. Do pray, that I'll know when the time comes.

On a side note, what is wrong with my parents? Everytime, they call and would expect me to give them some thing to share.... you know what I mean? I think they are starting to get worried. So am I.... They even went to say who knows, maybe God will provide one during my mission trip!! What the?!! Anyway, yeah, pray along that too.

Thanks Kristy!

2007-03-29T00:43:00.000+08:00

Received a parcel today from Kristy, all the way from China. Thanks, gal, so much for thinking of me.

A back pack for my mission trip :) Almost the width of my bed.

God, My Provider

2007-03-19T23:16:00.000+08:00

Thanksgiving...

Went to collect our air tickets to Japan on Saturday. Rushed down from the wedding to orchard! walked with that super high heels... so fast as the office was about to close. And thank God for His protection. I carried $3500 in cash! yes, the travel agency didn't have a NETS machine. Thank God, I made it safely to the office, alone... my team leader was suppose to come along, but last minute had to go clinic..

Then, upon payment, the agent told me that the airlines was going to charge another $150 per ticket cos of the extra stop over in Taipei. What?! Made some noise and agent said will call the airline on monday to bargain. What to do? I just prayed. Pray so hard...

So, this morning, she called me... we don't have to pay! Elated! Save $600.. heee

Also, Sunday service... Pastor Satish shared how God called him into the ministry, out of nothing.... today, he has more than enough. His secret - to trust God, give as much as you receive...in fact more... freely you give, freely you receive. God told Him to trust and never ever hint, beg or ask money from anyone.

These 40 years of ministry, he hasn't and kept to God's promise... He has never lacked anything. He said if you trust in people, organisation, church... that is how much you will receive. But if you trust in God, it just blows your mind.

Wondering for myself...as I raise funds for MEET. I gotta admit, eventhough I tried to tell myself I will trust in Him and not beg, hint or anything of that sort... I kinda failed. I relied on my own understanding. Eventhough I pray everyday to Him, I thought I try to do things my way too. This message kind of struck me so hard...

This little incident of $600 has reminded me God is my provider.... I shall trust in Him alone.

To add, well, today I did my laundry. Woke up at 8.30am. Sun was shinning brightly. Thought good day to dry clothes. Then, now more than an hour after I hang my laundry, dark clouds came... oh oh... Thought gonna rain... Prayed. And it didn't rain! My clothes took a little longer than usual to dry. But bottomline is God gave me good weather.

Worship You Alone

2007-03-18T23:01:00.000+08:00

Worship You Alone
by Planet Shakers

Your faithfulness never fails

Your faithfulness everyday

You're the same

Unfailing love sets me free

Unfailing love you lead me

With your hand

And all i know

With your arms around me

Your face is all that i seek

Your love and grace

Pick me up and hold me

You alone are holy

Chorus:

For you alone are great in power

You alone are my strong tower

And i will lift my heart and soul

To worship you alone

For you alone are my desire

You have set my heart on fire

And i will lift my heart and soul

To worship you alone

Worship you alone

Learn a new song today in church...

Wedding Bells

2007-03-17T23:24:00.000+08:00

Congrats to Eugene and Karen! May the Lord bless this union :) Picture taken with fellow CFers...

My First

2007-03-17T00:17:00.000+08:00

Blood donation.... haha.. ok, lame lame. But I'm kind giving myself a pat on the shoulder.... Took the guts to just donate since I have always wanted to but chickened out. Gotta say that the nurses there were very professional. Registration, doctor screening, blood test and donation took less than an hour. Must say that the needle used to test the blood hurt more than the huge needle to draw blood. And I told them it was my first time donating... and the nurse kindly explained all the procedures. She is so good at the needle that there is no bruising, even though she said the vain she picked may cause bad bruises. anyway, thank God it all went smoothly... met some new people along the way while waiting and thank God I'm fine, despite having 1 pint of blood less! :)

ok, very lame blog!

I'm Coming Back Again

2007-03-11T21:25:00.000+08:00

I must admit that I've strayed a little way off over the 2 weeks of break. Somehow, God was put aside when I have my family... Then, coming back here, in 1 week, I was bombared with 2 presentations, 3 written assignments (first one law essay of 1500 words, second an analysis of a company's strategy 3000 words and finally law essay 2000 words)... I pushed myself to do it from scratch and was rather stressed out. Couple with little sleep... and one of the nights burning 4 over hours of just to settle elections for CF AGM.... Gotta admit I was almost at the edge... but no, I pushed on... my spirit was weary, like a soul beaten up, pressed...

Went to church on a low mood. But somehow, God saw my state. It was great to just leave everything aside to worship Him. And if it didn't refresh me enough, the message today was really appropriate for me. Ps Glen spoke on "the In-Between". He shared how God works by giving promises to the people (eg. Joseph, Abraham, Paul) about how he will bring them out of a place/state and bring them into the promise. But from the promise to the fulfillment of it, nothing is mentioned... until you walk it.

Joseph went through being sold as a slave, thrown into prison etc before he was made PM. Abraham lived as a nomad, without a permanent place, old and without child despite God's promise of a promised land and to be the father of many nations. Paul was called to be a light to the gentiles, but it wasn't told that he will have to suffer so much until later.

All these things in-between are not told. Just the promise and the hope that it will be brought to pass. Adding to the fact I'm reading Hebrews 11 today. Faith. Trust in God. Obedience. Perserverance. No matter what. What is the purpose? 1 Cor 13. To be purified. To receive our reward.

And what is that reward? Crown. Yes, just like kings who wear crowns. And people get crowns because they conquered something. What did we conquer? All these trials and hardships in between. Revelations shows the elders casting down their crown before the Lamb on the throne. But why lay it down? Because of Jesus. We would not have made it if not for Him. That is why we give it back to Him.

Doesn't it make it all so worth it?

Being reminded that this life that we live will be meaningless until we have found the One who makes it all worth living for. Jesus. Thank you, God for reminding me that this passage of life, before we meet You in heaven, is just a pilgrimage.

Oceans Will Part
Hillsongs - Mighty To Save

Verse 1
If my heart has grown cold
There Your love will unfold
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
When I’m blind to my way
There Your Spirit will pray
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand.

Chorus:
Oceans will part, Nations come
At the whisper of Your call
Hope will rise, Glory shown
In my life, Your will be done

Verse 2
Present suffering may pass
Lord, Your mercy will last
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
And my heart will find praise
I’ll delight in Your way
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand
As You open my eyes to the work of Your hand

Marketing Concepts

2007-03-06T22:49:00.000+08:00

A Professor was explaining marketing concepts to the Students:

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say:"I am very rich. Marry me!"
- That's Direct Marketing.
2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him."
- That's Advertising.
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her>telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me."
- That's Telemarketing.
4. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say: By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?"
-That's Public Relations.
5. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: You are very rich! Can you marry ! me?"
- That's Brand Recognition.
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face.
- That's Customer Feedback.
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband.
- That's demand and supply gap.
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him
- That's competition eatinginto your market share.
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives.
- That's restriction for entering new markets.

Back To Reality

2007-03-05T16:15:00.000+08:00

Hurhur... back to campus to continue my semester.... the last 2 weeks was like being in dream land ;) gone home for almost 12 days. haha... that's the longest I ever. not counting semester break of course. Had a wonerful time just being at home with all 5 of us. The house was noisy! haha... a little rubbing here and there. but yeah, that's part of the package.

CNY Family photo

Joanne enjoying CNY lunch at Apo's place :)
Also help Jo shift to her new place in Seremban. Tiring to travel up and down twice! But it was nice to see her settle down at a new place. Joanne and the pick up we used to transport her stuff. I forgot how many trips she made just to shift. ANd each time, it will be a car load full of things!

Her room, looks cosy eh.

My turn will be coming soon too. Headache!

Back to school :(

Wish I was home...

2007-02-24T19:51:00.000+08:00

Its recess week...but I don't feel like it is...hmmm... maybe because I just went home for 6 days! haha! It was really good to be home. After 6 weeks out here battling (literally, hahaha), tired, and really in need of TLC, mama's touch and my twinie's hugz =)

I am so hopelessly a family and homely person. But, being away from home has made me strong, not afraid of being alone... I remembered I was so scared to be left alone last time. But I hope it has not made a a person that is too independant... my daddy says that it will really be a turn off point for guys. They feel intimidated to approach a girl whom they see as 'able to manage everything on their own, no weak spot' kind (maybe a bit 'agressine'?, dunno what is the correct word).... yeah, daddy was making noise about me not having a boyfriend yet. Well, I guess circumstances have made me this way... and I am hoping the guy God has prepared for me (if he really has) will be someone who will be about to lead me and is as independant.. . I told daddy that I may appear to be all sufficient, but I am definitely willing to submit myself to someone. I never like taking the lead, unless needed. Then daddy asked me what kind of guy I was looking for. I told him it would be someone like him ;p

Yes, had a good chit chat with daddy.. he came down just to accompany me back to Melaka for CNY. Though it cost me quite a bomb to buy to bus ticket during peak season!

Then mummy... I just want to manja her... she wants me to manja me too.. hehe...

My joep, I really love you! I miss talking to her. She's the only one whom we can trust each other. And the one with whom we can share our passion with - God. We can talk endlessly about it.

Only my bro... hmm.. we seem to drift.. but still blood is thicker than water. We still talk about work, movies, gadgets and all... pray that one day, ko, you will find that passion in God, and remember the One who spared your life and know that there is a purpose for that. I pray that you will not live your life idlely, but instead give your life to serving Him, as you once wanted to. You are to be like Isaac, whom Abraham gave unto the Lord... what has become of that?

Family aside, CNY was really a good time of family reunion, meeting up with classmates... food and food and food! until I couldn't take it! But it is also sad to see that only my family and our paternal grandma and uncle's family is saved among our extanded family and my classmates...except for maybe 4... out of the about 56 of us. But thank God one just came to the Lord last year... my sis had the priviledge of reaping that harvest.

Went to OMF's prayer meeting for Japan all the way in Kembangan. Thank GOd I met Qi Bin (a former MEET Japan tripper). Otherwise I won't know a single soul there! And the first person I shook my hands with was the NTUCF alumni contact I got. God really made sure I didn't feel left out. It was good to hear the sharing of people who had gone there. And also to see a couple who is preparing to leave this year.... Ah, to hear their testimony really moved my heart. And I wish that one day I could share such a testimony.

They both grew up in church and went through CF in their varsity years. Both always had missions at the back of their minds and weren't sure if it was their calling. But when they met, missions was they thing they talked about. It was through their marriage that they knew their calling to missions were confirmed. And know they are preparing to be sent.

I remember reading about Rolland and Heidi Baker. How God told her to break of from her fiancee and marry Rolland, who had the same calling as her. And now, after so many years, they are still effectively serving the Lord in orphanages in Africa. Thousands of children have been blessed and saved.

If finding a partner could be as easy as that.... k, I blabbing...

Happy Chinese New Year

2007-02-16T16:01:00.000+08:00

To everyone :)

Back in Melaka... Just hope I won't put on weight with all the intake of food! Haha..

and in the midst of all the prosperous feasting and angpows, let us remember those in poverty.. many in the world are living on less than US$2 a day....

Life

2007-02-15T00:17:00.000+08:00

Continued from previous...

10/2 Saturday... I must admit by that day I was tired. I begin this sem thinking it was going to be light. But no. I am struggling here to manage time and work. Anyway, went to church for a Zone outreach meeting. Thank God, a friend came along with me, throguh a last minute sms. God works in ways I cannot understand. But I hope she was touched somehow.

We met 1.5 hours earlier to pray for the event. But Wenhui felt that we should instead continue to praise God and edify our spirit as there was a sense of heaviness. Yeah, I must have carried my burdens there. But as I just close my eyes, forget everything and just focus on giving my God the worship, His presence was just there and I felt a release. Yeah. I mean it was so real. Not an emotion, but I just know it in my spirit. If worship would be like this all the time.

Anyway they showed a documentary on a life of a taiwanese actor. Christian, young and just got married. Diagnose with cancer just after wedding. Tragic, suffering... Good looking, but because of the cancer, his physical body just wasted away and his face was beyond recognition. I mean it looked really awfull. Told that he just had 3 months to live. What he did really blew my mind. He spent the last lap of his life going round testifying about Jesus' love and the gospel. From a man who had life and all he could ever dreamed of and had everything taken from him and now about to die... I wonder if I could ever have faith like that. He return to be with the Lord. His wife stayed with him through out and continued testifying of the Lord's goodness.

I guess the few things I learnt or was challenged:
Come what may, will we still praise the Lord?
Life may just take a turn for the worst. Are we prepared? Do you know what lies ahead of you when you die?

11/2 Sunday... Church... well something funny happen after that. There was a survey on all the singles in the church... quite amusing at what happen. Enuf said. If got time i will blog.

Met up with Hong Anh and we went to Mustafa. Really can find everything under the roof. Branded Swiss watches to massages and groceries! Still keep in touch with her. Wonder if she will ever understand the gospel...

12/2 Monday... MEET TBS 5 on Prayer and Missions. Learn what the Lord's prayer is and how we must pray for missions. Ask me if you want to know more.

13/2 Tuesday again. Really dislike it. Loonnnggg day 10 hours non-stop! Who can take it? Tired, really tired.... God sustain me, please. MEET and study and CF is stretching me...

Pressed but not crushed

2007-02-14T23:34:00.000+08:00

Last week was an awesome week despite my lack of time.

6/2 Tuesday was the longest day in my life here. Started at 7am for Leader's meeting. Class 8.30 to 6.30pm, non stop. Brain dead. Rushed all the way to church for Training and Equiping and came back only at 11pm. No dinner...physically, I didn't know how I managed to pull through. God's strength certainly took over.

Continued the study on church history. From the reformation, we went on to the great awakening. It was the era where mass evangelism spread under george Whitefield, the methodist movement under the wesleys and the birth of modern missions - count Zinzendorf and the moravians, William Carrey, David Livingstone, Hudson Taylor and many more. Next the 19th century was the Pentecostal movement. Where it was the move of revival with people like Charles Finney, George Muller, Dwight Moody, William Booth, Charles Spurgeon, Rees Howells, Charles Parham and Smith Wigglesworth. It was in this century, the Azuza Street revival and Welsh revival occured.

The similarity between the most of these people was that they desired to uphold holiness and lived righteous, simplistic life and had a intense prayer life. Am I up to it?

7/2 Wednesday... CG was membership drive. Had a personal chat with my 2 cgms and got to know them much much better after that. Told them of my passion for student/campus ministry. Though they don't seem to be that eager, I hope they will see the importance. Though I know God has different calling for everyone.

8/2 Thursday... NTU's first campus day of prayer. It was great to see Christians gather together as one to pray for the school. There was also a sharing about prayer. And the speaker once again the Azuza and Welsh revival, and how it started through prayer. God must be reinforcing it to me.... Yes, God, teach me to have a prayer life like that.

What if I give it all?

2007-02-05T19:46:00.000+08:00

He heard the preacher say a single dime can feed
A hungry boy or girl with nothing to eat
So he pulled a dollar from the pocket of his jeans
And he asked his mama how many will this feed
She just smiled and when she told him ten
He reached back again

CHORUS:

What if I give all I have?
What will that gift do?
My child a gift like that could change the world
It could feed a multitude
He didn’t close his eyes or turn away
He saw the need and I can hear him say
What if I gave all

Three birthday dollars could have bought a special toy
But he reminds me of another little boy
Who gave to Jesus a gift of fish and bread
I wonder if he said

REPEAT CHORUS

And long ago a Father and a Son
Saw the children lost in sin
Can you see the tears in the Father’s eyes
As Jesus says to Him

What if I give all I have?
What will that gift do?
My Son, that gift will change the world
It will free the multitudes
What if I give all I have?
What will that gift do?

My child, a gift like that can change the world
It could feed a multitude
We cannot close our eyes and turn them away
When we hear His Spirit call
We see the need now, let us hear us say
What if I give all?
What if I give all?

Ray Boltz 1996

This song was inspired by the young boy who gave the little of what he had to Jesus and it was multiplied that it fed thousands of people (John 6)
Let's learn to give all that we have to God. Let Him multiply it and bless the multitude.

Crazy Christians Wanted

2007-02-05T19:18:00.000+08:00

Last MEET Joint Meeting, a person from Care Channels came down to share with us his journey in life. Though only 43 years old, he has served the Lord in many ways. Even 7 years in the Philipines, working in the slumps, helping the very very poor people. Well, he shared how it was working with them... the sad stories, the trying times....

He ended by saying that many have requested him to go overseas to Pakistans, East Timor etc to help the poor there. But his hands are already full, working for Care Channels here, missions and church. What his prayer request was that many would step up and be crazy (radical) people, to serve God. That coming from a man who gave up his SGD100,000 pay job (not including bonuses etc) and from a pretty comfortable life (his wife is a doctor)... he uprooted himself to be sent to the fields... to work in the slumps of Philipines!

No coincidence, I was reading the book on student power in world missions. It gave a brief history of how student movement impacted the world missions movement. Thousands were send overseas as a result. But they responded to that call when they were still university students. Eg the Wesley brothers from Oxford, CT Studd and the other 6 from Cambridge, Jim Elloit and co, Hudson Taylor, Samuel Mills (who started the Haystack movement) etc. All these men rose up, dedicated themselves to missions, and went out. Great exploits. Many died for the gospel.

Crazy Christians.

Count me in.

Am at crossroads in my life. Going to step put to work soon

Don't want to go with the flow...

I know God is teaching me. May I life live worthy of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Relfections of the week

2007-01-27T13:31:00.000+08:00

Another busy week... felt drained. Somehow I can't seem to keep account of where my time went.

Sunday
Church, visited Lan to say farewell... she's going to Paris for exchange. Well, my prayers for her. May this exchange give her sometime to ponder upon life and to appreciate all God has given her... Most importantly, God, please watch over her... no one will know how she is doing spiritually... keep her close to You.

Dad, mum and Joep left for Phuket. May God use them mightily there to bless the people. MAy they also be encouraged by seeing how God is moving in that place. To read more about what is happening in phuket... I'm really glad to hear how the church is growing there. The tsunami in 2004 has really opened a spiritual door. People are just entering the kingdom!

Monday
Class from 8.30 to 5pm..none stop! Lunch was provided as the lesson cover fine dining and it was our practical seesion. I was totally in a dilemma... firstly I wanted to fast (had the prompting to do so to pray for my parents and sister in phuket)... Secondly, there was prawns and quarter a chicken. How am I suppose to eat those with a fork and knife? Well, thank God, in His great wisdom, I was fasting.. so that was my excuse... but food was wasted... well, at least I didn't have to eat.... it would be impossible and I'll look like a total ****.
After that rush to church prayer meeting...by the time I came back it was 9pm...

Tuesday
Class 8.30 to 2.30pm. Again no break. Another class 4.30 to 6.30pm and after that rush to VCF FT to raise funds for MEET. Another tiring day... Thank God, we managed to raise a few hundred $ with some love gifts. Another $9k plus to go...Well, I think I will trust God to provide for everything we need.

Wednesday
Attempted to do my work which was accumulating since Monday.... but just no mood... just couldn't study effectively.
Had to prepare BS and class for 4 hours! I really hate the new system where seminars are now 4hours! How are we suppose to absorb everything? *duh*
CG at night. It was a good time of sharing. But ended quite late... have to work on timing...

Thursday
Interview with our Japanese Christian at 9am! What an ungodly hour but no choice. Our team die die have to do this interview and it was the only time we could slot in.
Anyway, the 2 hours spent was really beneficial. We learn so much more about the Japanese culture, what they value (group harmony, success), religion (is a ritual, a hush-hush thing because of their history.. will post up the details after my group has consolidated our research),
Christianty in Japan (we got to hear why it is such a hard ground), how do we approach them when we're there etc...
Rushed back for tutorial... only to find out that I didn't prepare before hand! Aiyo, must have forgotten to do my readings before class... blur blur.... k, need to back up! Some how I giving more time to studying Japanese and other stuff than studying.... must be the slacking mentality of mine. haha.. the two law modules I have seem to have so much less readings than the previous ones and they are literally spoon feeding us in class! heheeheee

Evening was our CF prayer meeting.... somehow I don't understand why is it so hard to get people to pray... Wonder how much time are we really setting aside to pray, to intercede for the lost... I'm thinking why aren't we as effective as the early church or great men of God in history...its because these people spent hours on their knees daily in prayer... not that they had nothing to do... but they sacrificed other things in order to pray. Who said that Christianity was free? Only salvation is. The rest requires a price. I think this mentality of "a relationship with God" is really causing some of us to take our walk with God lighlty. If it was a relationship and not religion, then why are we not investing our resources into it? Time to wake up! It breaks my heart to see Christians living mediocre standards... myself too at times....

But I came back to my room that day, and something just overwhelmed me... won't share it here, but God was really real at that moment. I repented of something I knew I had been procrastinating... I surrendered an area of my life I know had not been really dealt with yet.

Friday
Free day! Yippee... spent the morning doing Japanese homework and trying to remember all the hiragana. Jap class in the afternoon...Went for CG... which surprisingly, we talked about finances (tithing and giving to God etc)when sharing was over... wanted to voice what I think, but I think my idea may be a bit radical (for first time hearers, but not unbiblical) and because I have not started earning yet, I may not really be in a position to say anything...

But my thoughts (in short) are everything we have belongs to God... We are just His stewards. Its not that we give to God 10%. All belongs to God, the 10% is just a minimum... We should not have the mentality that 90% is ours to spend as we like. Rather, as I have read from great men of God (like Hudson Taylor, George Muller and Rees Howells), they gave everything. What ever they needed they asked from the Heavenly Father. They died leaving very little money but in their lifetime they managed Millions of pounds. How come? They always saw that all they had was God's... My pastor once challenged us:

One managment guru has billions of dollars to give away (can't remember his name but he's one of the riches man on earth). Problem: He didn't know who to give it to. Cos he couldn't trust them to manage it. And you know whom He gave to finally?
Bill Gates, the richest man on earth. Why? Cos he knew Bill Gates could be trusted.

Challenge: Can the church today be trusted with such money?

Thanksgiving

2007-01-23T14:43:00.000+08:00

Its a wonder how God works... I couldn't get my Japanese class earlier as I didn't know I had to acknowledge it. Fine. So I went down to the Office of Academic Services to make some noise and appeal. They virtually ignored my appeal as I already fulfilled all my requirement to graduate. Priority to be given to other students. Ok. Fine.

So I just submited my appeal and surrendered it to God. Pray. I checked the system for subject vacancies... always 0. Fine. Eventually I gave up. Maybe not God's will. I've done all I could possibily think of.

The closing date to finalise the timetable was last Sunday at 10pm. I didn't know what time it ends actually. So at 10.30, I felt God prompted me to just check one more time. It was actually a silly thing to do as I had tried in vain all the while. And I had also gave up and wasn't thinking about it anymore. Anyway, I checked the system and to my excitment, I saw at least 6 vacancies! I was so glad, I wanted to add. But by then, the dateline just closed. That's it.

So I went to school to appeal again. To cut the long admin part, I went straight to the subject coordinator and wrote in my reason.

So today, I got the reply that I got it! haha! God really works when we had given up. God is teaching me to just surrender. It's always when we've reach the end of ourselves that He starts working.

Week 2

2007-01-21T22:55:00.000+08:00

Been a busy week... don't know how come I feel there's so much things to do, even though the time I use to study is less...

Monday
Bought Insolvency Law book and completed readings for last and this week. 301 class was fun as we learn about dressing properly. Didn't know there were so much rules to dressing!
Busy trying in vain to get Jap class.. s*****d me to fail to acknowledge.. haiz

Tuesday
6 hours class, lunch with Lan, church

Wednesday
4 hour class, CG... thank God for the great bunch of people this semester! Hope that this semester we will have a better time and I'll be a better CGL.

Thursday
2 hour tutorial... the most fun thus far... we competed to built the tallest tower using poker cards! haha... must say this is the most fun and out of the box tutorial I ever had! Followed by leaders' meeting for 2 hours... God, I admit I almost lost my temper waiting... Teach me patience, patience... though I have slight patience, this incident made me realise how little my threshold was. Waiting 1/2 hour without anything to do almost made me "letup"...

Friday
Free day! Dad and Joep came down to visit me... So happy, woke up early to clean the room and waited for their arrival. Hanged out in my room and had lunch at Crystal Jade. Yummy! Quite reasonable.. Bid farewell to them at 3.30pm.
Waited for the 2 superman haha.. Eugene and Carlsen to come over to put some FES books in the room. Thank God the boxes fit well under the bed.

Saturday
Spent the whole day baking cookies for MEET fundraising. It was fun. Thank God for Shirlene who kindly opened her home and her mum who was just so surporting! Produced 700 plus cookies in 6 hours, time included for lunch, groceries and all... haha.. what an accomplishment!

My Testimony

2007-01-13T22:17:00.000+08:00

Here's a piece pf my testimony I wrote for my mission trip... hope it'll bless you!

When I was young, before I knew about God , I was an unhappy child. I didn’t like the way I looked and was a very sensitive person – easily hurt by small remarks. For example I will be very upset when people say “stupid” or “fatty”. Negative thoughts always crept into my mind and I will start condemning myself, thinking that nobody understood me. I was also fearful – afraid of rejection by my friends, schoolmates and people around me. I was also fearful of the future. For example - What am I going to be when I grow up? Will I be accepted?

My parents became Christians when I was around 6 years old. It was then that I started attending Sunday school and heard about Jesus. The Christians told me that Jesus was the Son of God who gave up His place in heaven and came down to earth to die for the world. But Jesus did not just die, He rose again after three days.

Did you know that Jesus died for you and me?

We were all in sin, separated from God. As a punishment of sin, we had to die. But God, our Father who created us, wanted us to come back to Him. And as any father, He didn’t want us to suffer and so He sent Jesus, His son to die at our place. So now, the way to God is opened to all who will belief in Jesus.

When I heard this, I felt comforted that someone would love me. I believe in Jesus. By my parent’s encouragement, I got baptized when I was eleven years old. This step was necessary to say that I wanted to follow Jesus and declare that from that day on, I will be a Christian. Since then, I diligently read the Bible and prayed to God. Day by day, God became more real to me. He was not just any other god whom my ancestors worship – one who seems so far away and is waiting to see if you have done anything wrong so that he could punish you. No, the God I knew was one that loved everyone and desires for each one of us to be near Him. He is interested in us. Slowly, as I began to walk closely to God, I discovered more about Him. It was like a relationship with a very close friend.

After becoming a Christian and as I walked with God everyday, I discovered how much He loves each one of us and that He cares. He sees each one of us as uniquely and beautifully made, with a purpose. I realized that God, even though I don’t see Him, is with me and He fully understands the situation that I’m in. He understood the pain I went through when others said the negative things about me – when I felt lonely, as though nobody loves me and that my birth was a mistake. He too went through the worst rejection when He had to die for us.

Besides, I discovered what it means to have God in my life. By knowing there is a God, I know there is someone who is in control of the things that are happening all around me – the past, the present and even future. By knowing God is with me, I know that there is someone whom I can turn to when I am in trouble. By knowing that God created us and that we are by no accident gave me a sense of purpose in life.

Knowing that God is creator of everything has also helped me understand that He has laid a plan for each one of us. We are created for a purpose and that there was no mistake when God created me. There was a point when I was at a cross road in life and I really didn’t know what to do with my future. It was then that God gave me this verse in Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the plans I have for you… plans to give you a hope and a future”. This verse reminded that God has planned everything for me and I do not have to worry.

It has been more than 10 years since my baptism. God has been and still is good to me. He saw me through my childhood and delivered me from being one who is unhappy and fearful to one that is happy and contented with life. I overcame the fear of rejection and of the future by knowing God loves me and has my future laid down in advance. I now live my life knowing that there is a purpose for all things that happened and there is no fear of the future. Though it is unknown, but I know the One who holds the future.

I will like to end of my sharing by asking that you ponder upon the things I have shared. Are you living in fear as I was last time? Are you feeling as though life had no purpose?
God has changed my life. He can change yours too.

Thanksgiving

2007-01-13T21:52:00.000+08:00

Into the first week of school. Thank God for a reasonable timetable. 4 day week.. and after Week 5, it'll be a 3 day week. Weee!!! Thank God I got 3 core modules only this sem - Strategic management, Employment Law and Insolvency. Though its 2 law module which can be daunting, I hope it won't be as bad as all the previous semester. Thank God for seeing me through all these years. Though now I don't even though if my results are good enough for a second upper... I just surrender it to God... Hope I can make it.. but on the other hand, who cares? Got a job already... Thank God for that too.

Thank God that I am in MEET this year.. I can't believe if I could handle all the work if I were in it last year! It was a blessing in disguise. Anyway, I thank God for the awesome team. Though 2 of them are super, super busy, I thank God He laid everything in order... My slack timetable allows me lots of free time... So we can help one another's workload. I wouldn't mind doing more work... that's why we are called a team.... God is awesome and wise isn't it?

I've learnt so much more about missions through this training. Now, we are on our own to do all the planning and stuff. Seems like a lot, but pray that God will see us through. There's planing of our itenary, contacting and liasing with our host missionary, plan budget, fundraising (coming out with prayer letters, things to sell, visiting churches), learning the language, culture.. preparing our items like testimony, sermons... etc etc... So much! But it will sure be a good learning experience. Do pray for me and all fellow MEET trippers. Got to balance this, school work, church and CF... that's a handfull. But yet, I'm so happy to be able to be of service to our God most high.

Ok, enough of me rambling.... hehee... Jesus, I'm just so glad to have You with me!

Hello 2007!

2007-01-03T22:34:00.000+08:00

Can't believe its now 2007! Time flies!

Thanksgiving...
Thank You God for seeing me through 2006 - studies, internship, CF, relationships, hardships
Thank You God for the people around me, Your faithfulness (You have always been wiith me, tho I sometime forget), so much to be thankful for...

My regrets...
I have a few... not seeing my friends coming to know You personally (Hope they will do so one day, pray!)
... not meditating on Your Word as I should
... not building as many friendships as I did in my first year... I have become complacent in my friendships and am not investing in new!

New year resolution
... take my spiritual walk more seriously, to see God's kingdom advance
... friends with deeper friendship
... courtship?? hahaha.. my aunts n mum making such a fuss about me being single. ok I give up turing a deaf ear to their 'persuasion' and have to admit I shall start keeping my eyes open for one (when I start work.. but still... I shall not worry, God has my future planned out)
exicting year ahead as it will be my last semester in NTU, going for my first real mission trip and starting work...

that's all from me. Holiday is good. Came back from MEET camp blessed. It was a simulated mission trip. Can't say much about the camp as we are sworn to keep it secret. Only thing I can say its that I really got to know my team mates better and have a better idea of what to expect on my coming trip. Learn a lot from this camp.

In KL now to be with my sis as she sits for her finals... also, on a shopping spree - actually more to keep an eye on the spending haha... I'm the kiam ka na of the family!

Going back to singapore soon... school starting on 8th.

MEET camp

2006-12-20T23:38:00.000+08:00

tomorrow, the unknown will be revealed. the MEET co. has been so secretive about the camp and even past MEET trippers were sworn to secrecy about this camp. well, i'll know what we're going to do..soon...

the last few days have been tiring for me.

15/12 came back to s'pore, straight for TM
16/12 TM (10am - 2pm) and JM (2 - 6pm). went to the botanic gardens for the 1st time since i came here and visited OMF.
17/12 church, mum and 2 cousins came, brought them round bugis and orchard
18/12 jalan at vivocity, TM (1-5pm), dinner with relative and more sightseeing
19/12 jalan at singapore river, suntec and bugis, send mum & cousins off, shop for face paint, TM (9pm and team slumber party at NUS - since our previous effort was not quite suitable.... we practiced so hard, but kena rejected)
20/12 our sups vetted our presentation (thank God they were happy with it), laundry, pack for camp

sorry, my writing a bit cluttered today. no time to write properly... anyway it was raining nonstop for 2 days. really regret couldn't take my mum and cousins to jalan as the rain ruined my plans. then running between doing MEET stuff and accompanying my mum. sometimes its really pushed me to the limit.

MEET camp.. am looking forward.. okla.. will stop here.

Recap so far

2006-12-16T22:19:00.000+08:00

This blog feels like its going to pupus (go extinct).... k, time for some updating.

Have secured a job. Thank God I won't have to worry about unemployment upon graduation. But, but it means I have to really count my days to the end of my uni education, which also means having holidays, late mornings, can choose not to go class if don't feel like to etc etc...
Sad, sad, the next few years in auditing will no doubt cause me to age faster... all the stress and late nights... someone sponsor me some anti-aging supplement :)

Leaders' retreat was fantastic... although its called a retreat, I always say (and will keep to my stand) that it is never a retreat. Instead, we spend hours brain storming (sometimes till we storm our brains out I think)... it's all worth while. NOthing can be compared to the joy of serving our Lord Jesus. Though it may really s-t-r-e-c-t-h us beyong what I can imagine (doing ministry work instead of school work), I guess when I look back, its really by the grace of God. Am looking forward to next semester.... though I know I may have to miss some due to MEET.

As yes, MEET preparation so far has been mind blowing... doing lots of reading on Japan, their culture and all... reading about missionaries (just finished Hudson Taylor).. After reading and what we've learn through the trainings so far, I realize how shallow my thinking about missions have been. Am even doubting whether I can really be a missionary. I feel so inadequate - I know so little about Christianity (theologically speaking) and I just lack the guts to evangelise sometimes... argh! hope that by the end of the trainings and all the months of personal preparation, I will trully, trully be prepared to preach the word in season and out of season.

I am learning a lot... okok, got to get back to prearing my Christmas sermon. I can't imagine that I have to prepare one and it is to be presented to a group of ex-drug addicts!

Holiday?

2006-12-02T00:55:00.000+08:00

I think I'm physically more tired than during exams.... let's see where has all the time gone too...

30/11 Finish exam, PWC interview, clear notes
1/12 clean room, KPMG interview, Mabel's birthday
2/12 prepare BS with Kristy, cell group
3/12 church
4/12 EY interview, church outing
5/12 Deloitte interview, CG outing, Deutsche bank interview
6 - 8/12 Leaders' retreat and planning
9/12 Balik? or outing with IMF sheraton team?
.
.
.
15/12 Team Meeting (JM) , TBS 3
16/12 JM 3
17/12 Church
18 - 20/12 TMs
21 - 24/12 MEET camp
25/12 Christmas... balik?

Packed, packed, packed... had no time to just slack since exam was over... in fact running all over for interviews, getting things done... catching up with people... thinking about CF...

I want a job in ***! Thank God KPMG secured ad! hahaa... got a job before I even finish my studies! *beams* Now to work on the other interviews.... God I know you already know which one is for me... And regarding the Deutsche bank job (see previous post), I know its all in Your hands. I already gave up on that by not going for the interview... but out of the blue moon they called me again. So, I'll go this time and see how...

Just want to rest... but... aiyah... body aching from wearing heels. Wanna sleep but hair still wet... :(

Exam, Interviews

2006-11-23T22:31:00.000+08:00

In the midst of exams.... though I know most of my coursemates have either Merdeka or have 1 more next week... Me le, got a miserable number of 3...and the thing is, the last 2 papers killed me.... God, help me make it. Done what I could already. Yours now.

And worst thing, the short listed students for Big 4 (public accounting firms) were out 2 days ago and this totally distracted me from revision... Yes, I thank God I got selected for all.... Imagine this kind of schedule

28/11 1300 - 1530 LC80
29/11 0900 - 1130 AA206
1330 EY interview
1400 Deloitte interview
30/11 0900 - 1130 BL247
1315 PWC interview
1/12 1500 KPMG interview
1800 Mabel's birthday

Cannot la like that... how? You want me to split into how many pieces? Ar? Tell me....

Sighs... anyway, manage to find people to at least change the 29/11 interview... for now just que sera sera... don't want to think about it... I SHOULD BE REVISING.

k, thinking about going home.....miss home. I want my home. mummy.....

Job Interview #1

2006-11-11T00:24:00.000+08:00

Walau!!! Got an email today notifying me of a job interview with Deutsche Bank this Tuesday. What?! Going to laugh my head off. I don't even remember applying for this and it was just for fun...cos I thought since many people will be wanting to work in Investment Banks (but I don't know why.... prestige?)... Anyway it was just to see if I could get shortlisted. And yes I got.... so what now?

I really don't want to work in a bank... really, I just don't like the idea of following the market and all. So what now? ok, I sort of lied in my cover letter that it was my ambition to work in a bank.. haha.. thought by our Career Director to learn how to impress... haha.. smoke a bit.

Back to my dilemma.. how? feel like just not going for interview... just go MIA. Exam is just 2 days away after the interview and I think I'ld rather spend my resources revising instead of preparing for the interview.

Anyway got this from Deutsche Bank on the interview process

There are three areas essential for leaving a good impression during your interview with Deutsche Bank:
1. Know yourself
2. Know Deutsche Bank
3. Know the industry/know the job

Know yourself
Before you put yourself through our interview process, make sure you know who you are. Know what you want to do and why you want to do it. Understand that people get into financial services for many reasons. This is a challenging career. Make sure you know what your motivations are. You’ll be asked about them.
Why do you want to work for Deutsche Bank?
Why have you chosen the role you are applying for?
What activities have you done in the past?
Where have you worked?
What kind of person are you?
What are your strengths and weaknesses?
What do you love and hate?
Make sure you know your resume

Know Deutsche Bank
We’ve been around for a long time. Know our history as well as the most recent deal we closed.
What countries do we operate in?
How many divisions do we have?
What divisions operate in the region you are interested in?
What is our organizational structure?
Who are our senior managers?
How many people from your school did we hire last year?
What are some of the more important/news worthy deals we just closed?
Have you talked to any company representatives/current employees?
What do recent Deutsche Bank Interns at your school have to say about us?

Know the industry/know the job
We realize that every job has a large learning curve. When you join Deutsche Bank you will take part in a comprehensive training program. However, we expect you to demonstrate an understanding of some fundamental concepts about the industry and the position you are applying for.
Get used to banking lingo; fixed income, cash flow, bond
Follow the large markets. We don’t expect you to know the exact percentage change of a specific stock but we do expect you to know the major trends in some of the large financial markets
Know who the major players are in the industry
For roles in core functions such as HR, Technology and Operations know why you would rather do this work in finance as opposed to another industry
Have a few questions prepared to demonstrate you’ve done some research and want more information
Show that you understand what your role would entail and what makes you a good candidate

Alamak, after going through the questions, I think I just won't make it lor... blur blur.... HOW?!

Sick...

2006-11-02T20:14:00.000+08:00

Not feeling well... down with fever and sore, sore throat... worse still had MEET team meeting 1 all the way in NUS... but thank God I survived... much better today. Prayer really works!

Anyway, me itching about Japan..so some greetings in Japanese :)

Good morning

Good afternoon

Good evening

Goodbye

Goodnight

MEET

2006-10-28T23:38:00.000+08:00

Dear God,

I just feel that I need to express my thoughts to You...
Why am I so different from others? I mean that my peers seem to have different mindsets and problems from me... I feel like I'm so contented with everything I have and all... people are like wanting to travel here and there and go for exchange (and the way they say is like they must die-die go).... my peers seem to be so ambitious in their career... when I don't even know where and what I want to do in the secular world... instead what I have in my heart is the desire to serve You... to bring Your message to the nations. Why am I like this? God, is it that Your call for me is different? Why can't I identify with my peers... for me, all their worries and desires and so forth are just like r*****h, meaning****. How am I suppose to relate if I can't identify? Instead, how come I feel for the suffering, lonely, poor and helpless?

Lord, I know You have everything laid out. I yield my thoughts, ambitions, dreams and all to You. I wanna make this life You've given worth living for... for You...

MEET progress: I'm going to JAPAN for a month! Really mind blowing... but I know God has laid it all ahead.
Been to 2 Joint Meetings now. Learnt about how God's plan was laid from the beginning of time to the end. How everything that happened was for His glory.
Today, we covered the topic of content and contextualization. How much should the gospel and missionaries adapt to the cross cultures... A speaker from OMF came to share with us his thoughts.... will post my reflections on these topic once I'm done...

My purpose of joining: Please pray along side with me....
1. To discover the call of missions
2. To sharpen my spiritual discerment
3. To know God (in a wider, global perspective) and that He may increase my faith

Please uphold all of us in prayer as we have lots to prepare and have to cope with our normal secualr job!

Another Year has gone by

2006-10-28T00:28:00.000+08:00

Dear God,

I thank You for seeing me through these 21 years. You have been so good to me and have carried me through it all. Though at times I admit that I don't acknowledge Your presence, I know You are with me always. Who is like You, so faithful, gracious... I'm complete in You. Thank You for all You've given to me - my hope, life, family, friends, the things I have, the past, present and even the future....

As a new year unfolds, I pray that You will guide me, as You have done so in the past... especially now that I'm going into a new phase in life. Lead me in all decisions that are to be made - work, ministry, relationships. May this year also be a year of growth spiritually. As I prepare to go on the mission trip, let me sharpen my spiritual discernment and grow in my faith in Christ.

I submit myself to You. Lord, use me as Your instrument. All honor, praise and glory be unto Your name forever and forever. Amen.

Ps. Thanks to all who remembered, specially vivi, rhoda and mabel. Appreciate you gals... cheryl and anesia too!

How Great

2006-10-11T23:22:00.000+08:00

Beautiful Saviour

Planet Shakers

Jesus, Beautiful Saviour,

God of all Majesty,The risen king

Lamb of God, Holy and righteous,

Blessed redeemer,Bright morning star

Pre chorus

All the heavens shout your praise,

All creation bow to worship you

Chorus

How wonderful, how beautiful,

Name above every name, exalted high

How wonderful, how beautiful,

Jesus your name, name above every name,

Jesus

Bridge

I will sing forever, Jesus I love you, Jesus I love you

Jesus, You are indeed awesome.
I really have no time these days. Am sacrificing my sleep to do my work, juggle church and CF... Why so much work? Worse, got to think about applying for jobs.
But I just wanna take this little time to update this blog of mine.... to say how good God has been. He's real. Where can you ever find a God who loves you so, so much? Who cares about you... who sustains you and carries you... ah, God, I'm speechless! I'm just filled with thanksgiving and praise.

S2006

2006-09-23T07:16:00.000+08:00

Some updates about me... into Week 7 of school.
Just completed IMF World Bank Board Of Governors Annual General Meeting. Volunteered to be the Information Desk Officer and was posted at Sherton Hotel. The job was to help the delegates arrange their transportation while they are here, answer queries and just help in whatever way to give them a warm welcome. Was a good experience, made new friends and did something I'll never get in class. Though the last 2 weeks was hectic....having to go to school in the morning, work from 2.30 to 10.30pm, then came back to complete homework.... Been super busy, having not enough time to sleep and do my work.
Thank God its now a one week hooliday! Time to catch up on work and sleep.

Some pictures from Sheraton....
The team... Gouwei and Calvin (Army people, from Armed Development Force unit), Chin Yuen, Sandy, Me, Cheryl and Jennifer (our IC from ministry of defence). Our Information Desk...

The beautiful hotel. Was great working in a hotel. Seeing how the operate, interacting with the hotel staff and going down to places guest will never see.

On our last day at work, we saw 32 lamborghinis! Wow, amazing. The carpark was worth at least SGD32m! not to mention 2 Feraris. We saw how the door opens upward (signature of the expensive car) For more pictures of the car, visit my yahoo pictures.... there's a link at the right side of the page - click on the button Yahoo Pictures

Coloured?

2006-08-21T19:34:00.000+08:00

GOt it from a friend. This poem was nominated for the best poem of 2005, written by an African child.

When I born, I black.

When I grow up, I black.

When I go in sun, I black.

When I scared, I black. When I sick, I black.

And when I die, I still back.

And you white people.

\When u born, u pink.

When u grow up, u white.

When u go in sun, u red.

When u cold, u blue.

When u scared, u yellow.

When u sick, u green

And when u die, u gray… & u calling me colored??

Recap of my last few weeks

2006-08-11T19:51:00.000+08:00

Start of School
Began my sem with 6 hours straight of lessons. With recruitment fair, welcome tea and running all over the place... I'm a bit exhausted. Going to fall sick already...

But I shall get my strength from my God. Pray that I'll make it through my final year... lots of stuff - Final Year in NTU, involved in CF as BS leader, voluntaring in S2006 (IMF/WOrld Bank Conference), and wanting to join MEET (mission training for a year)... I'm overwhelmed! But the joy of the Lord is my strength!

Wanna shine for Him! Wanna tell the world about Jesus!

NTU Christian Fellowship Freshmen Orientation Camp '06

Leader's Retreat at Aloha Loyang

Unexplainable feeling

2006-07-16T20:18:00.000+08:00

Been through an roller coaster week.

My internship has finally ended. Can't believe it was so fast! Still remember the first day we stepped in. Now its over. Thank You God for the wonderful experience, friendships and opportunities openned. Now, I can say that I may consider starting off as an auditor. Feel its better, accounts is not my cup of tea, I realised. May be its also because in audit we work as a team. Auditing is fun, except for the ungodly working hours! Don't know how I can juggle ministry and work.

Feel sad to say goodbye to my colleagues. They've been a bunch of awesome people. Its very family like. Our audit supervisor (Pau Choo)is like a mother...haha.. nagging, instructing in a motherly way (though she's single but in her 40s). Then the audit team which has majority guys (Thai Tong, Alex, Jih Hong, Evi, Siew Sia and others) Haha.. one of them asked me how is it being the "guys lady", people say being the ladies' guy, this case terbalik pulak... always picking on me to tease... wah, will miss them... Thanks people, I don't know how to further express my gratitude. I really enjoyed the 10 weeks. Hope to drop by one day.

Hanya Tuhan sahaja yang tahu betapa ku menghargai kamu semua...

God open an opprtunity for me to share the gospel with my mentor, Thai Tong, whom I have been working together. Through the few weeks we were toghether, I took chances to just share what God has done and he just ask a lot about Christianity. God, please let the seed sown not be taken away, but let it take root and grow. I just have such a bond with him and I want to see him come to know You... please save him. I've done my part, please convict his heart.

Just finish reading Even Greater by Reinhard Bonnke and Always Enough by Rolland & Heidi Baker. Both about what God is doing in Africa. Our God is alive and moving! Miracles are still happening! Very, very ,very good book!